@mastersrex
Your friendly supplier of dad jokes. Just an old dog, likes early cars, tractors and radios. Please, no RP and especially no pics of your junk either, unless it’s junk cars or tractors. Have CMT & mild mobility issues Therians welcome. No Zoos or Peddos!
Here’s a little known story about me.
When visiting my grandparents farm as a small child I found a WW1 gas mask in a trunk.
Of course what’s the first thing I’m going to do ? Put it on and run through the woods with the beams of the autumn sun occasionally reflecting in the lenses.
Good times
A new company is making pants out of spider webs.
They look great but the fly keeps getting stuck.
Oh no ! I’m so sorry.
My deepest condolences 💐
Wow
With all the bad weather in the Midwest the family movie tonight is Twister with Bill Paxton and Helen Hunt.
Stay tuned for flying cows 🐄
Two hamburgers got married, they soon had a bun in the oven.
They forgot to use condomints
A wasp 🐝 landed on my bare foot, I now know how to river dance
It’s from Zootopia 2
Did we ever find out what happened to that poor Dik-dik that got stuck in a tuba ?
I went to the acupuncturist the other day, when I came home I found my voodoo doll was dead.
Beautiful
Pic of the Zootopia 2 DVD
SCORE !
What do you get when you cross a Jehova’s Witness with an Agnostic ?
Someone who’s at your doorstep but they don’t know why
My last girlfriend wanted to be treated like a princess so I married her off to France to secure an alliance.
In a recent survey only one in seven dwarfs is happy
When women get older they tend to collect chickens 🐓.
It’s called Henopause
Guy was working high up on scaffolding and accidentally cut his ear off.
He yelled down, Has anyone seen an ear 👂 down there ?
Guy finds and holds up a bloody ear, Is this it ?
No, mine had a pencil ✏️ behind it.
When you find out you are part of
“Generation Jones”.
Great, another thing to keep me up at night ruminating over and over in my derpy husky brain 🧠.
My girlfriend asked me to draw her a milk bath.
I asked if she wanted it pasteurized.
She said no, just up to her chin
A friend of mine is allergic to cotton, he was prescribed pills for it but he can’t get them out of the bottle
Scientists are looking into the disappearance of all the crows 🐦⬛
They still haven’t found the caws
I was talking to a surgeon and he said he puts organs back in upside down for laughs.
I told him I don’t get it.
He replied, it’s an inside joke
Here’s a mind reader’s joke for all you mind readers out there
It’s like I fell asleep in the bark o lounger in 2010 watching Scrubs and woke up in 2025 and it’s still on.
Yeah, I must admit that one was a groaner
Why couldn’t the art dealer pay his rent ?
He ran out of Monet.
My friend just quit his job at BMW, ironically there was no indicator he was going to take that turn in his career.
I was at a French restaurant last night and I asked the wife if we have been here before ?
Honey are you having Deja Vu ?
No I’m having the chicken
