But they can hear you approaching.

Safety first.

Before you do anything to it, could do with a tutorial of your regime. Given how curly my beard tends to grow, getting is as straight as yours even for a short time would be wonderful.

That's better

And one in return. Nighty night.

STFU ScreenSaver - Winter Sports Phone Fall Protection The STFU Screensaver is your new winter sports must-have! Seamlessly attach your phone to your outfit, safe and protected with every ski adventure.

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Bought one of these for skiing so I wouldn't lose my phone on a chairlift or, more importantly, when I crashed. Fantastic.

Morning
#MCM

If you're after punishment, I can think of a few more interesting ways.

Mind you don't catch a chill.

Isn't every day Friday for you now?

Your outdated pop music references are making me feel like I'm drowning in Berlin.

Is it Monday morning already? 10 more minutes. #MCM

I still think that for either event you need to be a bit of a headcase. Any sensible person with half a brain would say 'fuck that' and head for the bar.

So what really is the difference between this and big air? Both seem to be jumpy and twisty events but without poles or crossing your legs. Both seem to be the perfect way to totally fuck up your knees.

At least Harry can finally relax that he's not the biggest fuck up in the family.

Totally understand.

Just send it to me then!

Waiting for the body builder photo in the obligatory posing pouch.....

What it feels like.

I know it's a couple of days late, but the Ginger One found and sent me the perfect card for Valentines Day.

Hmmm. I can only recommend the half starvation option. I went to having a normal cereal breakfast and a reduced regular evening meal, but only one small tin of mackerel for lunch. I've dropped 9kg in about 3 months and it is surprising how quickly the body adapts to lower calories.

The yeti has woken.

Meribel.

Not bad view to wake up to for breakfast

Was thinking a bowling ball and dildo to make the act a bit risqué. Would doing it naked be OTT?

Woo hoo! One third of my home juggling kit has been delivered by Amazon. Britain's Got Talent here i come.

Did you not tip the waiter enough again?

I think we need to stage an intervention. I'm worried this is becoming an addiction.