Coffee Porter Jr.'s Avatar

Coffee Porter Jr.

@unlox

“From the number of imaginable cities we must exclude those whose elements are assembled without a connecting thread, an inner rule, a perspective, a discourse.” -Italo Calvino, Invisible Cities (transl. William Weaver) header by MV, quoting Waikiki Wanda

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03.05.2023
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Latest posts by Coffee Porter Jr. @unlox

glad the new pfp is gonna keep staring at me for a while

07.03.2026 03:07 👍 4 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

the one time I go an hour without looking at my phone and this breaks. lesson learned

07.03.2026 03:04 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

alright. alright! this is fine! it’s gonna be good! losing those two draft picks will soften up the roster in a couple years when Mike McCarthy is gone and the Steelers are ready to be competitive again

07.03.2026 03:01 👍 8 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

If I was 17 and got Aaron Judge to ground into a double play, I think it would at least temporarily make me a completely unlikeable person

07.03.2026 01:48 👍 137 🔁 19 💬 3 📌 6

that last one’s got MAHA particles coming off it, priors undefeated

07.03.2026 01:15 👍 10 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

at least take up lying

06.03.2026 23:43 👍 14 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

wendys nuts

06.03.2026 23:32 👍 7 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Noem out, Neom out, judging by the anagrams it’s some kind of… Omen…

06.03.2026 23:16 👍 14 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0

fandom war between Curve Radius and Brack Water Mercenary is so toxic

06.03.2026 22:59 👍 12 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0

37 likes

06.03.2026 21:44 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

bang

06.03.2026 21:41 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

once again, no refunds. love to see it

06.03.2026 21:34 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

typical yinzer celebrating that they got a white coach again

06.03.2026 21:13 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

woke reboot having seattle in the role of pittsburgh smh

06.03.2026 21:08 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

no one pays me to go to the gym. in fact, usually you have to pay. so I don’t but it’s not my fault, it’s sociedy

06.03.2026 20:11 👍 12 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

sometimes you gotta let a feghoot out. I read pearls before swine back when I got a newspaper

06.03.2026 19:16 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

campaigning in three phases: gender posturing that engages people who want an angry shirtless white dude, digging through his past for positive-sounding things to undercut criticism, and dealing with backlash as it becomes clear it’ll persist. or for short, “turn on, Tune Inn, and drop out”

06.03.2026 19:12 👍 7 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

how people with blue eyes look at you from the rotoworld website

06.03.2026 18:56 👍 12 🔁 2 💬 0 📌 0

“going to war” welcome to the Trump administration buddy

06.03.2026 18:39 👍 6 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Post image

Today I Will Look The Burrito Man In The Eye and other stories of manifesting success

06.03.2026 15:55 👍 10545 🔁 1937 💬 106 📌 122

George Woker Bush and his father, the late George Her/they Woker Bush

06.03.2026 17:36 👍 71 🔁 6 💬 2 📌 0

Daily Wire production where the rogue antifa oompa-loompas (unacceptably unhappy in slavery) defeat Willy Woka and all five kids split the factory (none of them did anything wrong besides stealing fizzy lifting drinks)

06.03.2026 17:30 👍 4 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

it’s 80° and sunny out here and my internal monologue is a bunch of Sam Kinison noises

06.03.2026 17:28 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

“two minutes after the IP goes public domain” type

06.03.2026 17:24 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

In the posting lotus going "man," on inhale and "what," on exhale

27.09.2025 15:49 👍 64 🔁 19 💬 0 📌 0

Rare interior view of the Posting Lotus, the enchanted lotus where I think up my posts

26.10.2025 19:29 👍 46 🔁 5 💬 2 📌 0

SUSIE WILES:

06.03.2026 17:19 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

throwing his heart to the defense

06.03.2026 16:54 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Steelers QB room of rodgler, geno, and the reindeer

06.03.2026 16:34 👍 10 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

no this is about the Geno that’s *leaving* Vegas

06.03.2026 16:26 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0