G'raha Enthusiast - My Lord Estelle

so many bots finding my posts lately. 🙃

wild but not surprising lol

# Vgen and # VgenCom I’ve seen used a bit. and just throwing around # ArtCommission too.

I only succeeded through the power of friendship and social media. advertise your vgen commissions with the tag on here and you might get some bites.

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wishing you luck as well! we’re far from useless but society just doesn’t value creativity and genius anymore.

not entirely sure the anxiety and phantom pain are unrelated either.

I really gotta make good on my creative career goals cause my body just really won’t let me keep a w-2 job. I love working and getting paid but it’s either crushing anxiety or phantom pain that loses me every job ever.

same same same. I still don’t see myself in the mirror. I am piloting a flesh mech suit. my true form is not for human eyes.

Warm ups part 1

Warm ups part 2

Warm ups part 3

Warm ups part 4

I went to art school...

I had no clue this is what people meant by "warm ups". Like, a whole routine? Each part specific and functional? Dang.

Probably would have less "forgot how to draw" days if I did these every time. I'm gonna try it.

to be quite honest bluesky is what it is because twitter catastrophically fucked up like 30 times in a row

"We can automate [unpleasant labor] so that no one has to do it" is only a valid argument if accompanied by a clear and careful plan for how to ensure the people currently doing that labor find new gainful employment.

I think I want to go out into the woods again.

anxiety sooo soo bad today. please send G'raha.

unrelated, is anyone here an experienced personal assistant?

truly the bane of my existence is having so much I want to accomplish and then falling into the trap of regulating until I'm chill and all my motivation dries up.

when I start streaming again I'm going to talk so much about audhd and the cycle of time blindness and guilt and anxiety that comes along with it.

hi ☺️

my problem right now is that I want to offer a quality product but my idea of perfection is something that matches what the corporate merch makers offer and at the very least I'll need a uv printer for that. so I guess I'll have to sell some keychains as is in order to afford better ones later.

working again tomorrow and tuesday so I'll be trying to get 1/3 animation done before then. still got a lot of organizing to get done as I'm launching a few things this year, so I'm still thinking next month is when you'll see the majority of my progress. hoping I can keep the energy up. ❤️

I’m honestly so proud of myself. My adhd frustration didn’t stop me from seeing this through. This is just the beginning too. I have so many ideas!

Keychain made by me featuring my art, the crystal exarch reaches out, on the side says “embrace villainy.”

Success!! Aghhghh! Now I just need to save up for a UV printer for an even smoother look but look!! Handmade, hand cut keychains! No bubbles, no yellowing! I finally did it! (The cuts are a little rough cause it’s been a few months but those will be smoother as I get back into it.)

Lego LOTR is fun! I think there was some mishap with the IP so it was hard to get my ahold of my copy again but I think I still have it.

I got my first commissions from my 10 year old by the way. he dumped his bank on my desk and asked if I could make him two. they're characters from castle crashers. he gave me a dollar bill too, but that was "for being a good mom." I'm going to blow these out of the water.

Lego Star Wars and Lego Jurassic Park. I'd like to revisit them with them now that they're older. that'd be really fun.

been barely getting by. I'd like to change all that here soon. I want to live happily and enjoy things too. anyway, the video games I'd choose are the Lego games because those are the ones I first played with my kids. Lego Batman, Lego LOTR, Lego Indiana Jones, Lego Marvel, Lego Harry Potter.

the 9 games thing looks fun but then I realize just how much I've only ever done things to make other people happy or to just pass the time treading water. I love the games I've played, but it only makes me sad thinking about them. even XIV I haven't been able to properly appreciate because I've +

I dreamed I was telling G’raha how much I love him and apologized if it felt like a burden to him. 😩 that poor fictional cat man being attacked by my parasocial codependency.

workshop is as set up as it can be at the moment! hopefully this weekend I can get some momentum on those animations and my keychains! been feeling a little better today too so I hope I can keep the energy going.

Super stoked about all of this cause the crystal imagery insinuates more Raha relevance and the twins look like they’ve finally hit puberty. 😍

my brain has felt like it's on fire all day. am no happy.