All the cool kids have walked away completely from Twitter. Be a cool kid, Roy.
06.03.2026 01:46
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No, sorry, the Guthrie! That's hilarious!
06.03.2026 01:36
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But again, what do I know? I didn't think it would take over a year for the evil one to fire his first butt monkey.
06.03.2026 01:30
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But it's something she can point to as a centrist and say "Look, I played nice." Her outrage at the ICE occupation was liberally peppered with glad-handing and photo ops for her Governor campaign. She is covering all bases. Unless her constituents launch a massive vote no campaign, she'll say yes.
06.03.2026 01:28
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Here's the season. Were you maybe looking at And Then There Were None?
06.03.2026 01:24
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U kecked ur pants?
06.03.2026 01:08
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Amy is going to vote Yes. You just watch.
06.03.2026 01:05
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I keep forgetting you're a Sconnie. Did you see they're not doing any Shakespeare at all next season?
06.03.2026 01:02
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I think he's spring loaded. Jackass in a box.
05.03.2026 17:57
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If it's not Operation Cooter Scooter, I don't want to play in this timeline anymore.
03.03.2026 23:16
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Jesus, the last thing we need is for him to be a martyr. We got a taste of it with his "assassination attempt" so we don't need any more of that nonsense. Though I appreciate the sentiment.
01.03.2026 03:21
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Ferris Bueller, you're my hero.
27.02.2026 18:27
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I like the presumption that everyone shows up at the meat counter demanding "Give me filet mignon or give me death!"
RFK: "Now wait.... Have you tried ground beef?"
27.02.2026 17:54
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Savings tips from billionaires are the best.
27.02.2026 17:51
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Oh, the stories I could tell you about my first encounter with Lieutenant Cable....
24.02.2026 04:18
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You're paying waaaay too much attention to my innards, bucko.
23.02.2026 17:28
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That's the only version I hear in my head anymore.
22.02.2026 18:31
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Had to unfollow Klobs. I can't with her.
22.02.2026 16:49
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Love Sam Miller.
22.02.2026 15:29
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My kitty says hello to yours.
22.02.2026 00:39
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*lose 5 IQ points
Which I'm assuming means you took the deal. 😛
22.02.2026 00:30
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Senator, ICE continues to terrorize Minnesota. Please stop pretending that they're leaving. They are still abducting people in unnecessarily abusive ways and making them disappear. It would be nice if you would at least acknowledge this.
20.02.2026 15:09
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Perhaps we're all half human on our mother's side.
20.02.2026 15:05
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I can′t get to sleep
I think about the implications
Of diving in too deep
And possibly the complications
Especially at night
I worry over situations that
I know will be alright
It′s just overkill
20.02.2026 05:22
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Glad at least one of our senators is still asking hard questions.
19.02.2026 19:56
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It's, um, worse when the mister is an elementary SPED teacher....
19.02.2026 18:29
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The shoes are the giveaway.
19.02.2026 15:12
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The best defense is to wear mirrored sunglasses.
18.02.2026 22:20
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WHY DO YOU ASK ME TO IMAGINE AWFUL THINGS, FOUL TEMPTRESS?
17.02.2026 19:20
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