Leslie McLemore II

Elon is sailing on Ketamine and Apartheid.

That mf locked in.

MAGA pretending to be sleep while their two parents trade haymakers.

Also, if I was Goldberg, the Atlantic editor, I wouldve stayed in that chat for YEARS & then drop the Hit em Up of Investigative Reports.

I know, I know. Legally, wouldnt be the best idea, considering he wouldve been knowingly receiving highly classified information he isnt suppose to be privy to..

What if Marvin Sapp was like, “Y’all can’t leave until y’all come up off $40,000..”

And then someone in the back yelled, “Man, who do you think you kidnapped, Chelsea Clinton?!?”

Because, you know, that Rush Hour jok..nevermind.

I know that Crypt Keeper aka Skip Bayless is somewhere punching O2, right now.

“He was suppose to give ME all this attention!”

LeBron turned 40 and was like, “You know what? I think I’m going to start crashing tf out.”

And as a recently turned 40 year-old-myself, I don’t blame him one bit.

By 40, your knees match your patience. Sometimes it’s there. Sometimes it’s not. And just may buckle at any time.

It’s one thing to fuck up and add the editor of the Atlantic to a group text..

like, that’s the K2 of stupidity.

But the Mount Everest of stupidity is they were exchanging THE most classified intelligence in the world on a gawd damn messenger app. These idiots wouldn’t know a SCIF from a Chipotle.

Mississippi, the poorest state in the country, getting rid off its state income tax—which is 1/3 of its revenue—reminds me of the complex economic spending plan I implemented back in college called “The Fuck it Plan.”

The overdraft fees used to love me. Even sent me flowers one year.

“But, but Texas or Florida doesn’t have state income taxes! Durrrr!”

Well..

when Mississippi gets Disney World, Miami, an unlimited supply of cocaine (well, I guess Miami and coke are symbiotic), an unlimited supply of oil, and gargantuan healthcare industry, y’all let me know.

Someone referred to it as “Whiskeyleaks” and I couldn’t top that if I tried.

Pete Hegseth was drunk when he sent those texts.

A true D.U.I. hire.

When they say DEI, they mean n*ggas. Yes, DEI is not a Black centric inatitive. DEI covers a wide variety of marginalized folks, most of these folks being yt.

Doesn’t matter.

It’s the same to THEM. DEI and Black people, to them, is like Kleenex and tissue.

It can’t be that hard to understand.

All this bull 💩 just to cut as much spending as possible for tax cuts they can’t afford.

Drug Addict Math:

“We need a 4 trillion dollar tax cut!” *Scratches neck*

“The most spending we can cut is 2 trillion.”

“That’s close enough! Foe minus two equals zero, baby!”

“That’s not how math works.”

Shocked Trump didn’t have a cisgender mouse in the audience to highlight the impact of the “trans mouse study”.

“Stand up, Mickey. Biden totally took away resources needed for this..your name is Mickey, right?Biden GREATLY took away resources needed for this MICKEY to complete the maze on time.”

Rep. Al Green exemplified the true meaning of being an American hero..

And stand up—literally— with the assistance of a cane, I may add, against incompetent tyranny.

Black folks continually get the short end of the stick in this country, yet is there to save this 💩 hole during the worst of times.

Trump calling for the repeal of the Chips and Science Act was weird considering..

and excuse my tone..

SOME OF THE SAME MFS STANDING UP CLAPPING FOR THE REPEAL VOTED FOR THE MF BILL!

JD Vance got on about as much eyeliner as Melania.

Ole maybe it’s Green Day, maybe it’s Maybelline ahh 🥷

The Republicans are too evil.

The Democrats are too polite.

And my 401K is too fucked.

Thanks, America 🫡🇺🇸🦅

Trumps whole speech..

I would say Republican’s knees must be in some serious pain from all that sitting down only to have to get back up..

but they’ve been on their knees for years now.

Republicans care a lot about girls until you bring up guns, the leading cause of death of girls in this country.

More than cancer or car accidents.

Like, my daughters participate in drills at their schools to hide from school shooters, you f*cktards.

Speaking of teeth and lies..

Elon really be lying through them apartheid ass teeth.

Elon tells more lies and has more kids than Tim Scott has gums and teeth.

Which tells me that’s a lot of lies and kids..

Whenever Tim Scott stood up and flashed them teeth and gums, a 🦝 gained a wing.

A lot of wings were gained tonight, y’all.

This speech was Project 2025’s wildest dream.

Ain’t blame a yt person from Spain to Maine.

This speech reminded me of the random House of Commons footage I’ll sometimes catch on cspan.

“Fook you!”

“May I have the floor? Thank you. No. Fook you!”

My 401k after Trump’s First 100 days

The only time Trump didn’t lie is when he said, “Yeah, I’m about to fuck up this economy.”

Trump lied so much, it was hard to keep up.

Like, seriously. He had a lie for a lie. His lies have symbiotic relationships and shit. There was even one time he was so exhausted from lying, he started rambling.

But shit, he’s always rambling.

I haven’t seen an Al Green hate something as much as Trump since grits.

Wait..