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Mallory Langston

@primnimproper

Sorta-sabbitical-ing lawyer mom, former indigent parent counsel, plush robe and blanket enthusiast, Roger the alien fangirl, casually profane, bakes and builds shit.

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09.06.2023
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Latest posts by Mallory Langston @primnimproper

That's just science. Boom.

07.03.2026 19:01 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Big stripey black and gray tabby sleeping on chest of human. Human is using portable nebulizer because she's bad at breathing, but that is not cat's problem. Fair.

Big stripey black and gray tabby sleeping on chest of human. Human is using portable nebulizer because she's bad at breathing, but that is not cat's problem. Fair.

Tiger thinks he's an integral part of my breathing treatments, and he's not wrong.

07.03.2026 18:55 πŸ‘ 16 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

I don't know how to explain this to people who never did pageants, but it is painfully obvious that this woman has spent HOURS practicing her "listening face" in the mirror.

06.03.2026 20:05 πŸ‘ 10 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 3 πŸ“Œ 1

Hey, Collin, uh, quick question, friend...

WHAT THE FUCK?

05.03.2026 04:05 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

This is the good place. 😊

22.02.2026 21:30 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I think they know I can do it from my phone. There's definitely some high-level coordinating happening here.

22.02.2026 21:29 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Supine human on sofa, covered in 3 black cats, one looking to camera, and one stripey cat. Black dog snoozes by human legs, covered in gray blanket and cats.

Supine human on sofa, covered in 3 black cats, one looking to camera, and one stripey cat. Black dog snoozes by human legs, covered in gray blanket and cats.

"Raise the temp on the thermostat, human, or you'll never know freedom again."--Luci, aka Goose

22.02.2026 19:52 πŸ‘ 27 πŸ” 2 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 0

Shout out to every attorney who's had to read their own words back in court transcript form. (BTW, yeah, intelligent, thoughtful people speak like this because they're THINKING while talking, and not just saying the same stupid shit again and again.)

16.02.2026 20:21 πŸ‘ 12 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 0

Yes, it's a joke, but boy, howdy, this nails how I feel about the deep sense of security in what you know and what you don't that comes with education + experience in your field. The absolute ease with which I can joyfully say, "Hell if I know. That's none of my business."

13.02.2026 21:19 πŸ‘ 13 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

"I love mess."--Marie Kondo and me

13.02.2026 21:10 πŸ‘ 6 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

As a horror super fan, I was about to comment on the Mia Farrow of it all, until I read the second pic. 😁 You already knew this, but you nailed it.

11.02.2026 06:21 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Right!? I'm honestly impressed by the audacity. 😁

11.02.2026 06:11 πŸ‘ 6 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

I'm operating under the assumption that she's not licensed, or at least not in this jurisdiction. But it sure seems like she wants this judge to know her credentials.

11.02.2026 06:02 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

This is SO WEIRD. Why is she signing this shit? "This is pro se, but I need you to know I, his very important law prof mommy, wrote it, so he'll win." We all thinking she did all his homework and threatened legal action against teachers who pushed back, eh? This is how we got here.

11.02.2026 05:51 πŸ‘ 24 πŸ” 2 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 1

I assume you're posting these from beyond the grave because your heart burst. πŸ₯Ή

11.02.2026 05:33 πŸ‘ 4 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Preview
"Everything is gambling now": How betting is taking over America Gambling culture is enveloping American sports, politics, media and trading.

As I've said many times, this is an awful thing that we are doing to ourselves for no discernible reason.

10.02.2026 20:34 πŸ‘ 828 πŸ” 146 πŸ’¬ 33 πŸ“Œ 16

I don't know if y'all remember the way they marketed Ricky Martin, but his videos were extreeeemely, overtly hetero. Anyway, seeing those men grinding by that truck in the same performance that Ricky sang to us entirely in Spanish healed something in my 41-yo soul. We're not going back. Love wins.

09.02.2026 23:59 πŸ‘ 12 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0
Enslaved People’s work on sugar plantations – The Saint Lauretia Project

This is a good explainer.

runaways.gla.ac.uk/minecraft/in...

09.02.2026 05:14 πŸ‘ 180 πŸ” 19 πŸ’¬ 3 πŸ“Œ 3

The fact that Bad Bunny's halftime show made white bigots angry and feel excluded is A GOOD THING. It's one of the best things about it. It's not a problem to solve. It's a solution to pursue. Bigots *should* feel excluded. We should find *more* ways to celebrate the reality of USian diversity.

09.02.2026 12:07 πŸ‘ 2068 πŸ” 409 πŸ’¬ 10 πŸ“Œ 9

Turn your living room into a VIP-only nightclub that serves all of her favorite treats and plays all her favorite music.

09.02.2026 18:21 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Preview
Washington’s Corruption Has Created Another Humanitarian Crisis in Puerto Rico The island’s earthquakes are its latest man-made disaster.

If you didn’t catch the significance of the exploding transformers in Bad Bunny’s halftime show, I gotcha. Here’s one of a bunch of pieces I wrote from/on Puerto Rico about the crisisβ€”and Trump’s role in it. slate.com/news-and-pol...

09.02.2026 01:59 πŸ‘ 5295 πŸ” 2114 πŸ’¬ 43 πŸ“Œ 41

Benito is a threat b/c he makes art so alluring and enjoyable you want to understand everything about it and then you end up learning about sugar and slavery and colonialism and the TaΓ­nos and Hawaii and then you probably have some thoughts of your own, and that's why art is powerful and dangerous

09.02.2026 01:38 πŸ‘ 20659 πŸ” 5277 πŸ’¬ 108 πŸ“Œ 179

Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ugh.

07.02.2026 00:40 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Post image

I read the β€œSAVE Act” (the GOP’s new voter suppression bill) so you don’t have to. This is my one page summary. Jesus it’s bad. 1/

06.02.2026 19:54 πŸ‘ 3316 πŸ” 2164 πŸ’¬ 148 πŸ“Œ 173

THEY DID IT. EVERY SENATE DEMOCRAT just voted on an amendment to DEFUND ICE (rescind the BBB slush fund that keeps ICE open during a shutdown.) This amendment failed, but it shows broad support! KEEP CALLING and make it a demand to vote for the DHS funding bill!!

31.01.2026 00:23 πŸ‘ 10180 πŸ” 2967 πŸ’¬ 214 πŸ“Œ 115
Preview
Support Independent Journalism | GF

Georgia Fort's is chilling, and it's being overshadowed by the equally chilling arrest of Don Lemon.

A GoFundMe is being set up for Fort. In the meantime, you can support her work directly – without paying massive fundraising platform fees – through her website:

www.georgiafort.com/support

30.01.2026 16:28 πŸ‘ 2030 πŸ” 1229 πŸ’¬ 25 πŸ“Œ 33

Doomers should read more history. Reading about some of the darkest chapters in US history may sound depressing, but it gave me so many examples of ordinary people fighting for what's right despite horrendous odds.

31.01.2026 00:33 πŸ‘ 145 πŸ” 20 πŸ’¬ 3 πŸ“Œ 2

Let’s try this one in foreign correspondent voice:

State Security Forces Arrest Journalist Who Covered Protests Against Regime Official

30.01.2026 13:42 πŸ‘ 2660 πŸ” 921 πŸ’¬ 30 πŸ“Œ 9

Y'all, it matters that journalists are being arrested on US soil for existing as journalists. Remember when we told y'all fascist regimes look a particular way. This is that.

30.01.2026 14:20 πŸ‘ 1131 πŸ” 412 πŸ’¬ 10 πŸ“Œ 6
ICE Storm: Understanding Recent Immigration Attacks 
Wednesday February 4 
12 PT/ 3 ET
Panelists include NCLR President Imani Rupert-Gordon, VP of Legal Shannon Minter, Senior Staff Attorney Amy Whelan, Director of Community Justice and Access Ming Wong, Director of Hogar {Home} Noemi Calonje and Hogar {Home} Of Counsel Cara Jobson.

ICE Storm: Understanding Recent Immigration Attacks Wednesday February 4 12 PT/ 3 ET Panelists include NCLR President Imani Rupert-Gordon, VP of Legal Shannon Minter, Senior Staff Attorney Amy Whelan, Director of Community Justice and Access Ming Wong, Director of Hogar {Home} Noemi Calonje and Hogar {Home} Of Counsel Cara Jobson.

This Wed. Feb. 4th at 12 p.m. PT, join us for a virtual briefing with NCLR's immigration legal experts to learn more about how ICE attacks are impacting the LGBTQ community, the legal landscape, how we should understand these attacks and what lawyers & others can do to help.

30.01.2026 18:04 πŸ‘ 7 πŸ” 4 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 1