Maddie! 🏳️‍⚧️

Good morning to you! May your day be relaxing and continue with your healing. You sharing your journey helps give others inspiration and courage! 💜

Oh those are cute!!!

Just a first person view of my blue thigh high socks with three white bands at the top. Legs are extended and a white and copper husky is hidden behind my feet.

So we’re showing off our socks today? I’ll add mine into the mix… my pink ones are in the wash.

A girls gotta stay warm on a cold rainy day somehow. My skirt and thong are doing nothing to keep my lower half warm.

That’s Leilee hiding behind my feets.

Over my life, I must have gone between my full and shortened deadname 20 times. I also hated that my parents named us all after people in the bible.

Mine was adapted from a nickname provided by my spouse and coworkers.

Imagine my reaction when she didn’t get it or like it. On the flip side, if a coworker doesn’t enunciate it sounds like they’re using my chosen name.

Madison just seemed like a lovely fit for me. (I hate/HATED my deadname)

Yikes, I’ve heard this one before! I can almost hear the voice saying it too. I totally glossed over that tactic but it’s legit.

Insisting I put on my SQL girl hat on on a Friday should be considered a class 2 felony.

No tables or stored procedures are safe with me when it’s a Friday.

This is partially your fault. I read your stream of consciousness thread. It caused me to stop and reflect on my own journey the past 14 years. And it dawned on me… I have no idea what I like or want anymore aside from being authentically me.

You’re a wonderful gal, Morgan! Inspiring!

Kids these days will never know the fun of hitting the front page… those were some fun times!

Fortunate to have met some amazing peeps such as yourself during those years.

It’s truly amazing the damage people can do to you without you even realizing. Slowly, methodically, to establish that control.

Grace is important to give yourself. It’s not about being busy as you relearn yourself. It takes time and effort and many times a lot of tears.

Knowledge is strength!

I’m understanding more about why I became asexual.

I’m understanding why my mom’s passing was so traumatic and the abandonment after.

I’m understanding why I’m such a quiet person after a couple years of vlogging.

Having old content is extremely useful. Seeing myself BEFORE meeting her.

Rediscovering one’s self is a wild journey. I’m relearning what I enjoy. What I want in life.

Whether being the little spoon and intimacy to hobbies/routines. I’m blown away at how intensely I was groomed into prioritizing her. The lack of communication causing me to be on edge constantly.

Some positivity for Friday… I woke up at 4am. The dogs wanted out. Rainy last night caused them to hang out on the deck under cover.

Well I stayed up. Dozed on the couch but went back to bed for an hour.

Means I got TWO wake-up cuddle sessions with Quorra. Face buried in my neck. The best!!

I can’t with that episode of Starfleet Academy… that was one heck of a cliffhanger!

I’m going to need the next 7 days to fly by quickly. I need closure.

Also, consider this your LAST time in office. With your horrendously self serving track record, only MAGAs would vote for you. And you’re not the right gender for them to support you.

Your legacy in politics is shameful. I’ll NEVER host another of your campaign signs ever again. You are a FRAUD.

@gluesenkampperez.house.gov you’re such a fucking disgrace. I hope you and your family are impacted by ICE activities. You’re nothing more than a domestic terrorist at this point, enabling Nazis to SHIT on our constitution. The same one you swore an oath to defend.

Just resign. You’re a DISGRACE!

And also sabbaticals… I love those! I had one so far, they come available every 5 years worked. This time I won’t plan on puppy sitting for 30 days straight. I’ll probably travel some of that time. Who knows… holidays with the fam as the daughter/sister would be neat and new too.

I never take time off. So a request from me is abnormal. But I think I’m in a good spot to enjoy it and not come back to a shit storm.

I’ve been on call twice in the last 5 weeks… this break is going to be so nice. Naps, gardening, whip the yard into shape while looking cute, maybe gaming too.

I am… APPROVED! Because of course I am, if I don’t use my time off I’ll lose it I’ve got so much saved. And a 30 day sabbatical available for fall/winter.

Taking Friday the 13th off as well as Monday so I get a 4 day break. It will be bliss! I already plan on thrifting that Friday. More clothes!

It came at a huge cost but I think it just had to be this way. Deprogramming a decade worth of grooming is difficult, time consuming, and lengthy. Breaking cycles can be difficult, especially when it involves trauma bonding.

In the end, you are worth being a priority.

Tomorrow is Friday, which means a peaceful morning without the puppy being dropped off. Star Trek tonight and couch cuddles with my fur babies.

I always look forward to this part of the week. Peace.

As I journaled last night, in the calm quiet, I reflected on getting to this point. Long entry!

I could get used to bloomscrolling, especially with spring just around the corner.

Facts. Virtually all jobs require a drug screening. Leaders should be held to this same simple standard… especially those with that level of power and control.

Dang… I’m out to my whole immediate family now. And they’ve all been welcoming and supportive. A stark contrast to the reaction inside my own home.

I’m taking this as nothing else than a win! 🏳️‍⚧️

OMG that didn’t go as expected!

Not no contact but rather may be able to help answer some questions about his oldest kiddo.

I think my brother learning he’s got an older sister might actually bolster our ties. So wild!

I’ll second magic eraser. I’ve had good luck with that in the past.

Well I didn’t have coming out to my little bro on my radar tonight… here we go.

I’m expecting no contact after this is shared. And honestly it’ll be for the best. He’s more churchy than my mother was. This outta be interesting but then I’ll have come out to all my immediate fam. So there’s that.

Hey, corn dogs are serious business! I vlogged a state fair trip once and had a corn dog counter on the screen.

Serious. Business.

And also yay for friends getting work done. May we all have those opportunities eventually.

Wow, how?!? Mine was a radio dj (rock then country) so we always had music on and listening times during the evenings instead of television.

And a guy hit on me in the parking lot. Wtf was that all about. I don’t even have makeup on! It took a moment to register with my brain but yup, he tossed a compliment my way… and I liked it.

What a wild twist to a regular pharmacy trip!