Adam Selzer

Bankers always wrote the most boring autobiographies.

Card and QR code for "Hyperspace Pizza: A rock opera about time travel and butts" and novelization by Adam Selzer

New!*
HYPERSPACE PIZZA: A Rock Opera about Time Travel and Butts (and novelization) out today.

Everything good starts in a getaway car.

Get it where you stream stuff.
linktr.ee/hyperspacepi...

* - revamped, reconfigured, remixed, and relaunched.

“Spotify classics” playlist with Olivia Rodrigo on the cover.

Wanna feel old?

You see it a lot in duel challenges.

This is the slowest and worst version of the Hokey Pokey I have ever seen. Shake it all about already.

As a historian I am inclined to call him a damned rascal and a poltroon.

I’m on it.

Presumably the family? They wouldn’t have likely had much inside info on whether or not it was real, I don’t suppose.

I just wore my seat belt here in Chicago. Does that mean I’m more of a “rough man” than he is?

After my whistle patrol shift I guess I’ll eat some stew.

It’s his epitaph on his slab, though.

One more sour apple tree to plant.

Virtual Tour: Chicago's Spookiest Graves A virtual tour of some of the creepiest stories and spots in Chicago cemeteries... ghost stories, strange statues, true crime, and more!

Hey, my book CHICAGO'S SERIAL HUSBAND: THE MARRIAGES AND MURDERS OF JOHANN HOCH is runner-up in the Chicago's Reader's Best New Book By a Chicagoan poll!

Tonight's virtual tour is about Chicago's spookiest graves: www.eventbrite.com/e/virtual-to...

I’m really quite amazed that more great artists haven’t done Vince Guaraldi’s “Great Pumpkin Waltz.”

We Brake For No One, by The Limited Time from the album Hyperspace Pizza

HYPERSPACE PIZZA is my new* rock opera and novelization, including the new hard rocking “We Brake For No One.” Everything good starts in a getaway car.

thelimitedtime.bandcamp.com/track/we-bra...

That part’s great! The sentimental parts just get over the top for me (from what I remember; it’s been a few years).

Wait counting to 25 was little fort.

I loved the first half of Dombey; second had its moments.

Just count to 25 and you’ll be all right.

At the Music Box for Masked and Anonymous / @whitecitycinema.bsky.social ‘s book release!

If I held a million dollar per plate fundraiser I only need one idiot to come.

Even half an idiot I’ll be doing pretty well.

Yeah.

#whatwasinthatdribkbesidesaneggpepperandworcesteshiresauce

I wish I could host a million dollar per plate fundraiser.

All funds go to me just going wild with drinks and apps at bar trivia nights forever. Rattle your jewelery.

(They talked me into drinking a Prairie Oyster at Le Piano, my local jazz bar, just now and it’s now all falling into place.)

Dude’s face in the entryway of Trinity Church nyc

Here’s a Trinity Church NY guy who I think was frozen in the middle of a Scooby Doo chase scene. Happy birthday!

Oh, Death, why canst thou not sometimes be timely?

She's like an old samurai whose great battles are behind her but every once in a while she kills a man with piece of paper just to prove a point

Fuck yeah

Yes, I remember it all very well; I think Powell really did believe that speech with the pictures of the trucks.

At least W had the courtesy to spend months hyping bullshit reasons for a war instead of whatever this is.

Hard to believe Dillinger was so riveted that he didn’t notice all the agents coming and going.

Manhattan Melodrama! Mickey Rooney gets orphaned twice in the first time minutes; you have to have a heart of stone to see it and not laugh.

If Trump wants to help his friends get richer on betting markets, why not just throw them a bone if they bet he mentions Bigfoot in a speech or something?

(Of course if I ever get a chance to really fuck polymarket over with inside information myself, I sure won’t feel bad for polymarket).