Yessss
And she slept on me all night!
I get to be this one’s favorite
07.03.2026 13:24
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Something something I’m gonna ram it plenty
07.03.2026 02:33
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She’s pretty snuggly!!
07.03.2026 02:12
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Oh you flatter me
07.03.2026 02:12
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Yesssss!! Come say hi!
She’s got the zoomies right now
07.03.2026 00:58
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Installing chrome on my new laptop and Microsoft edge is literally begging me not to.
That’s so embarrassing
07.03.2026 00:58
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Yesssss!
She’s getting used to the house
07.03.2026 00:34
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When she tells you "you can stroke yourself in front of me"
🥴🥴
& then rides your thigh...
& then 69s on camera with you...
& then reverse cowgirl so you can watch her ass bouncing on your dick 🥴🥴🥴
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE NORMAL ABOUT THIS AND I DONT EVEN HAVE A DICK.
06.03.2026 23:03
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Come say hiiii!
06.03.2026 23:31
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They’re all foods the gremlin likes!
Mango, Coconut, and now Toast!
06.03.2026 23:31
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She’s a lil sweetie
06.03.2026 23:11
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Cal snuggling a new kitten!!!
I’ve heard ladies like muscly dudes and kittens.
Discuss.
(This is Toast!!! Newest member of the Darin household)
06.03.2026 23:09
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It’s 50 degrees out so I’m wearing a tanktop because fuck sleeves at this point.
Caught a few people giving me the up and down “mmmm” look, so I’ll ride that high for a bit
06.03.2026 21:35
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Our new girlfriend seems to be enjoying it 😈
06.03.2026 21:22
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That’s my specialty!!!
It’s even more fun when my wife is there to sit on the lucky gal’s face
06.03.2026 20:58
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Fuck. Lips.
Dark lipstick.
Yes please.
06.03.2026 14:32
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No. Their Dinos have mandatory health screenings. It may be an overstimulating nightmare, but they care about their employees
06.03.2026 13:50
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Ask me about my case of gonhorrea I got from visiting Jurassic Park.
Also ask me about why I’m banned from Jurassic Park
06.03.2026 13:29
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I need a dude to doggy
06.03.2026 12:57
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At least they all learned the origins of the word "Misogyny!"
06.03.2026 00:28
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We actually called it “the diva,” because the water pressure error came with about 3 minutes of high pitched “badoo badoo badoo” every goddamn time
05.03.2026 18:49
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Niiiice!
And yeah.
The old one would give us a “no water” error when there was clearly water in.
Then only partially drain
And then run, but FLOOD THE FUCKING KITCHEN….
And then 2 weeks ago it just decided it was done with us entirely…
05.03.2026 17:25
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I’m at the point in life where I’m SUPER EXCITED about a new dishwasher
05.03.2026 16:02
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(Wags tail!)
05.03.2026 13:42
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Okay fiiine.
I’ll band the wagon!
05.03.2026 12:48
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Radiant
05.03.2026 02:41
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Tobias Funke, is that you?
04.03.2026 22:25
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That is an oddly specific compliment…
But sounds very sincere!
03.03.2026 04:14
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I need to watch from the beginning/actually watch it (my mother in law was part way through and we watched a few episodes this week)
01.03.2026 03:23
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We saw her from above the clouds today!
Gremlin was THRILLED
01.03.2026 02:55
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