Cami

The epic highs and lows of Philadelphia dating (actually there aren’t any highs)

I’m just kidding my exsituationship never calls me. He is super old though.

I call my exsituationship boomerang because hes so old and always hitting me up. Like ok boomer, you rang?

Selfie of me standing in mirror.

Wait one last thing. Uh nevermind I forgot

Remembering I can play Elliott smith any time I want from the 200 doll hair speakers I bought off a guy with bleach blonde hair and gauges in Haddonfied New Jersey

Listening to a record and I keep trying to change it with my phone. Computers have ruined me

he could never matched my freak February

Getting stoned and burning little bits of my leg hair off= peaceful
Accidentally burning myself with the lighter and now it hurts = ow

picking out my blundstones out from the cubby after yoga class, hope I didn’t grab a changeling

And to top it all off, one of my reply guys got a girlfriend

decreasing my lexapro dosage… she’s unleashed

My coworker keeps calling me eclectic, when do I contact HR

‘who set her loose again’ January

Million dollar pussy? You can’t price this pussy. Don’t even think about money when you think of this pussy. This pussy transcends currency

Calling hurricane katrina ‘h.k.’ To confused people at work

I need SOMEONE to explain the video of the chocolate bar where they move it around an extra piece shows up

Leftist guys are the biggest dogs. Fuck you and your DSA membership

I despise autofiction. Wym you’re just lying to me?

No date January. day 6. gnawing my hand off

they come crawling back after 3 months right

RIGHT????

Ex texting me he’s seeing Marty supreme has gotta be the lowest way of trying to slide back in

I dreamt I had another room in my apartment with stairs to the roof

I love coming home from a first date, throwing myself on the bed, and crying

I really need to stop taking things so personally

Only dusty springfield understands what I’m feeling

btw my therapist gasped when I told her u said that to me

joint in an altoids tin with altoids

the universe giving me heartbreak as punishment for not finishing my graphic memoir

I love men, I wish they were actually people :(