EricTime

6 Strikers and 3 Forwards. Classic

Replying to every woman’s story on IG with “There she is” and just seeing what happens because I think 2016 is coming back bigly.

This shit hits hard as hell if your IQ is the temperature of a walk-in cooler.

Skybridge connecting two corner R-2 occupancies absolutely fucks though. Need like fifty more similar jawns.

Just seen on a variance application:
"I own a childcare ministry, which is operating out of a residential class two structure. I am
looking to get structure up too cold to become a class one structure."

Trying to get a structure "Up too cold" is amazing.

@npr.org 1A doing the rational liberal passive voice “The war in Iran is expanding” and trying to talk about it a cooly measured toned sounds fucking INSANE. Girl, listen to yourself. You are talking about The US triple tap bombing school. Go take a toaster bath.

Lindy West?
Profiled in the New York Times?!
About her polyamorous marriage?!?!
WOKE IS BACK ON THE MENU BOYS
LFGOOOOOOOOOO

🎶I don't care because they both suh-uck anyway

I don't care about that🎶

Rivers Cuomo voice:
🎵Ooo Weee Oooo, Secretary Markwayne Mullin
Oh-Oh, is replacing Kristi Noem🎵

The crazy thing is that the movie holds up better than the show

Officially old enough where, upon rewatch, I’m saying first season Arrested Development Jessica Walter can get it.

Rivers Cuomo voice:
🎵Ooo Weee Oooo, Secretary Markwayne Mullin
Oh-Oh, is replacing Kristi Noem🎵

RIP Frank Vincent, you could’ve really gotten some work in Tehran with this current version of the big wet President in office.

He heroically punched Jesse Waters and then he died on his way back to his home planet. Many such cases.

The first class action lawsuit against corporations engaging in aura farming is going to really challenge the boundaries of our legal system.

I think I originally saved this clip on my phone like 7 or 8 years ago. Dropping the kernel of it here just because, I don’t know, sometimes you have to keep pointing at the stupid monster and calling it a stupid monster, emphasizing both the stupidity and the monstrousness.

Jeff Rosenstock Insta post about Brenn Lukens opening

Just got tickets to see Brenn Lukens open for Jeff Rosenstock in Chicago. (Semi)MOBO comeback might save the world.

I hope Eve Fartlow gets pancaked by a dump truck

I've started not flipping my right turn signal when I'm in the right lane until I see the opposing light go yellow. That way no one behind me gets the idea to start beeping while we wait at the red like civilized people.

In Woke 2, we're shutting down the rat-runners. Stay on the main roads, Lebowski!

Celery, cabbage, and cauliflower goated af too fam. We’re cruciferous veggie gooning.

“HE FELL FOR THE SOUP!!”

President Analrapist.

The AES Representative out back of the building on their phone talking into one of the voice modulators from Scream.

This is the Tobias Funkë administration.

Big fucking magnet. Mystery solved, officer.

She was enchanted by the idea of a large Wisconsin man hollering at weird little nazi congressional pages in Brooks Brothers.

Lol, she listens to Chapo. Somebody sent her a 2018 episode. Amazing.

You know when you're dumdum impatient friend can't do the quick math in Risk that makes it obvious he can't beat everyone's armies, and all the other people have 5 cards for their next turns, but he's still going to try to take like three continents in one turn? We're that guy.

Steve Stipanovich