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Simon Ward

@simonjbward

Producer/Actor/Writer, currently in that order. Made Badjelly with Mukpuddy (TVNZ+, Family Canada, ABC Australia, ITV UK) & currently in production on BE WITH ZEE.

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09.01.2024
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Latest posts by Simon Ward @simonjbward

No we’re not running out of good ideas. We’re running out of people willing and able to invest in good ideas.

16.12.2025 06:15 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

This year I’m wishing everyone Murky Chasms to see if it catches on.

03.12.2025 02:20 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

“MY BODY MY RULES” declares the 4 year old as he sweeps an entire shelf of books to the floor.

Not _quite_ there with the consent conversation. But we’re working on it.

26.11.2025 06:13 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

That’s dementia rest-home shit

05.11.2025 18:59 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Take it from someone with an objective viewpoint (not in the US) - if an actual lefty wins anything in the US it’s downright historic (traditionally the Dems are about as lefty as our centre-right party, so…)

05.11.2025 18:57 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

JFC all the emails about how AI can do all the fun shit I spent my life figuring how to get paid for.

WHERE ARE THE AI REAL ESTATE AGENTS

27.06.2025 20:16 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
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27.06.2025 18:48 👍 148 🔁 26 💬 1 📌 1

The only parenting advice I have is heysiriplaythehappysongbyimogenheap
#iykyk

06.06.2025 20:50 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
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a man in a suit and tie is making a funny face and saying `` loud noises '' . ALT: a man in a suit and tie is making a funny face and saying `` loud noises '' .

“I don’t get headaches” is the sort of thing you say in your 30s before becoming a parent at 42.

17.05.2025 23:52 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
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a man in a blue shirt is making a funny face while sitting in a dark room . ALT: a man in a blue shirt is making a funny face while sitting in a dark room .

Finally Dutton can go back to his first love #auspol

04.05.2025 08:38 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
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Are National lining up their new Luxon?

06.03.2025 05:33 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

One could argue there’s a direct line between superhero movie dominance and the current situation - the masses sit around waiting for a hero to save them while the world’s worst pieces of shit stand up and declare themselves Chosen Ones.

14.02.2025 21:11 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

One year anniversary of this slice of internet gold.

15.01.2025 12:06 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Studies show that supermarkets are responsible for the second-highest amounts of food wastage.
In first place, my 3 year old.

15.01.2025 11:50 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
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Sorry, but I really hope people who love THE WILD ROBOT movie know it was inspired by my book. It's mentioned in the credits but most people don't read that stuff. If you love the movie you should check out the book! There's more to the story and it's a quick read.

11.12.2024 15:55 👍 4811 🔁 2040 💬 187 📌 89

Ugh. Time to “know what day of the week it is” again I guess.

12.01.2025 22:58 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
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Massive away win for the little fella.

02.12.2024 13:38 👍 57723 🔁 9530 💬 578 📌 367

How is there not a Masterchef recap show with all the people who have to do the dishes?

25.07.2024 08:32 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
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Giant phallus-shaped iceberg floating in Conception Bay surprises residents of Dildo, Canada A phallus-shaped iceberg hovered off the coast of Dildo, Newfoundland in Conception Bay before collapsing.

I honestly just don’t know what’s real any more.
www.livescience.com/planet-earth...

09.07.2024 22:17 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
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A brief history of self-regulation

09.07.2024 21:14 👍 743 🔁 314 💬 9 📌 9

That should 100% be a bonus short on his next Bluray

09.07.2024 20:33 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

LESS BREAKING

Simeon Brown as much of a dipshit as previously thought.

09.07.2024 20:32 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Same site, just changed to “disenshittification” at the guidance of Cory Doctorow.

udm14.com

23.05.2024 00:53 👍 161 🔁 63 💬 6 📌 7

This is a clear attempt to get everyone to call him The Red King instead of “Spaniel” and I for one will not stand for it.

15.05.2024 20:31 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

The only time I’ve ever cared about cricket is when Rusty steps up to bat. #iykyk #WhatWeDidntKnow

19.03.2024 04:48 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

If I can speak on behalf of Helen Keller (and I really can’t) that might be overthinking it.

03.03.2024 06:16 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
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Did you ever receive inspiration that you really didn’t appreciate because it was on the wall of the McDonald’s drive-through in Levin?

03.03.2024 00:16 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0
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Because becoming more conservative as you age was never a result of getting older, it was a function of getting richer. The greedy fucks took all the shit, so we never got richer. It's not fucking rocket science.

24.02.2024 01:54 👍 3277 🔁 1043 💬 53 📌 55

Oh my god whose idea was it to eat leftover Indian food in this heat

15.01.2024 23:53 👍 3 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 1

Valve running a YAY CAPITALISM special on Steam at the same time they announce that games with AI-generated content will now be accepted on Steam feels... not coincidental. And bad. It feels bad.

10.01.2024 04:34 👍 108 🔁 40 💬 2 📌 6