Commander Quinoa

Let’sa go

Sounds like Billy is ready to be the next surgeon general

How can they justify 2 billion a day for war when they can’t admit it’s a war?

Those things are significant but gosh I’m much more worried about all the corpses in his wake than job numbers

Does this decree mean Topanga is available?

When I am low on energy and need fuel, I eat a sandwich. Recently my phone said it was low battery. Why does my phone not work when I shove it full of ham?

So you think our survival odds are 32.33% repeating? You're way more optimistic than me.

That was fast. You must have had this locked and loaded, waiting for ND to skeet

I didn't realize we'd reached a phase where the portmanteau "sextortion" was wide-spread enough that it could be used without explanation in a photo caption.

The only cruise I’ve ever wanted to go on

Yeah. I know there’s many games on GP, I had it for 3 years before canceling recently. But the value proposition simply isn’t as favorable as it was at its outset and it doesn’t seem worth it’s monthly cost to me any more to pay every month for fewer Hanes that can disappear wherever it suits MS.

You’re really doing a good job of living up to the stereotypes that the rest of the world has about Americans here

ME: pack a bag, we’re flying to kansas

MY WAYWARD SON: what kind of bag

They also said it would cause “severe and irreparable harm” to his reputation by subjecting him to “public ridicule and harassment.”

Yeah, cry me a river

For just $30 a month you can play a game you could have bought for $25 bucks in 2021!

I'm going to save everyone a click and make it clear that he said he was not going to be cast in the show.

That said, all your posts lately have been click-bait shit like this so it's time to unfollow.

Fun, rather than pocket dialing you can now pocket immolate!

After 10,000 hours of listening to his explanations you're going to be GREAT at listening to his lectures.

That’s bonkers.

There are days where I feel lonely and sad and get comfort from being intimate with my wife. I’d hate for her to be like “too bad, we’re scheduled to dunk bits on Thursday”

Also there would be times they’d be scheduled to hump that evening but it’s a grim chore cause one person was a dick earlier.

When he was young, he was child porn. Tough break

They waited to strike until the middle of the day to make sure the school was full

You gotta keep em separated

Or at minimum “might makes a powerful distraction from the multiple allegations the president is a child rapist”

Operation Epic Furry? These guys are way too online

They don’t even blur your name out well enough it can’t just be read

Wasn’t trump advocating for a ban on any regulation by any state on AI for a decade like 6 months ago?

That's great and all but who still believes what DHS is saying? They have already said they have "left" Minneapolis twice in the past month yet they are still there

I’m not convinced the photo you’ve attached to the post is terribly appropriate for such a joke

It’s weird that I can’t make out lyrics in pretty much any song UNLESS the singer is from the North of England. Oasis, Morrissey, the Beatles, and a couple others I can understand almost every word in their songs. In the case of Oasis they are much easier to understand in song than spoken word even.