kelsie

He is going CRAZY

I had to go eat seafood by the water and. Now I have to drink a very fancy margarita :(

Husbands love having birthdays

I’m the princess of the day!!!!!!!

Not in da freakin mood…….

You can do anything in a Magna

No I did

When you walk in on the guinea pig owner trying to pry open the eye you tissue glued shut on purpose so as to give the impression of a peaceful death at their last viewing

I missed this I’m so sorry his name is Imp! And he has zero agression issues as you can see

Some really exciting news : he wearing a little hätte

I went to the gastrointestinal centre for excellence and they didn’t know you

Horrid farting boy I will have him stuffed and mounted on my mantle

Can you believe this

Stupefied by his sheer beauty. What an incredible gift he is. If my job eventually kills me it will have been worth it to have saved him

Keep thinking about the scream as a rabbit passed an enormous kidney stone today and wanting to cry

You gotta start with the most basic percussion instruments with cats. You cannot go straight to woodwind.

Very funny also to think I contacted his agent in order to commence an online relationship and post about it online

I mean

I did a “bit” a few years back where I was engaging with a scammer who claimed to be Russell Crowe and posting earnestly about our relationship and more than one person DM’ed me thinking I was in a real relationship with the real Russell Crowe and they had some message they wanted to send him

Am I too old for such an accessory ?

I’m working on it!!

Mr farting

If sweet disposition comes on and I don’t get into it then I’m experiencing a neurological event. They could have played it at my father’s graveside service and I’d have caught a vibe.

Middle management dick

When ghost riders in the sky comes on I get scared. That song is so scary.

It is weird to ask, thanks

You don’t need to know that I had diarrhoea this morning which I did btw …

Keep reminding myself I’m being chic and mysterious this year and I need to stop over sharing online

*voice shaking* oh cool

You’re never a fool for not knowing! Now you probably know more than me.