Murphy Murph's Avatar

Murphy Murph

@captmurphy

Still adjusting to the Astros being the evil team everyone hates.

57
Followers
40
Following
926
Posts
16.08.2023
Joined
Posts Following

Latest posts by Murphy Murph @captmurphy

Interesting. Anyway, fuck those right wing ghouls. I hope she haunts their nightmares.

16.02.2026 19:08 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

This fills my heart with joy.

16.02.2026 14:12 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

This is bad even by all star game standards.

15.02.2026 22:36 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Incredible insight, you stupid useless fuck.

13.02.2026 02:46 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Can you please ask him if he has ever felt shame?

13.02.2026 02:45 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

That’s just fraternity hazing.

13.02.2026 02:44 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s one of the cleaner places Bob Saget has done coke.

12.02.2026 20:44 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Preview
a man is walking through a chain link fence in a prison . ALT: a man is walking through a chain link fence in a prison .
12.02.2026 13:49 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Lmao who fucking cares about Mike Tyson?

12.02.2026 03:48 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

He’s basically Mr. Peanutbutter.

11.02.2026 17:54 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

You’re an idiot.

11.02.2026 17:51 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Mother fucker a Costco rotisserie chicken is like $6.

11.02.2026 13:39 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Ok but then how do you explain the Unplugged set list mere months before he died that included covers of β€œLake of Fire” and β€œJesus Don’t Want Me For A Sunbeam”!?

10.02.2026 23:46 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Don’t call us about a ransom, we’ll call you.

09.02.2026 13:53 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Here for the people buzzkilling the halftime show by tsk*tsk-ing me about what congress can actually do. Fuck you! You missed the entire point! There is no joy in your heart!

09.02.2026 02:51 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

It’s basically been living rent free in my head this entire game. I’m so mad.

09.02.2026 02:27 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Has your lovely wife levitated from rage thinking about CJ Stroud yet?

09.02.2026 02:23 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0
Post image

The Sermon on the Mount, by Beryl Lewis, before 1965, πŸ“Έ by @ScottStrazzante

09.02.2026 02:16 πŸ‘ 11998 πŸ” 2661 πŸ’¬ 58 πŸ“Œ 64
Terrified Conservatives Lose Ability To Speak English After Exposure To Bad Bunny Performance

Terrified Conservatives Lose Ability To Speak English After Exposure To Bad Bunny Performance

Terrified Conservatives Lose Ability To Speak English After Exposure To Bad Bunny Performance https://theonion.com/terrified-conservatives-lose-ability-to-speak-english-after-exposure-to-bad-bunny-performance-dios-mio-cry-millions-of-panicking-republicans/

09.02.2026 01:35 πŸ‘ 16950 πŸ” 3743 πŸ’¬ 136 πŸ“Œ 163

Ironic to see a halftime show that is all about artistic accomplishment and humanity and then go back to ads for the bullshit grift machines during a game athletes have worked and sacrificed and trained their entire lives to play it.

09.02.2026 01:36 πŸ‘ 150 πŸ” 41 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

This rules so much.

09.02.2026 01:25 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Genius comes in many forms.

09.02.2026 01:18 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Has Drake Maye played football before?

09.02.2026 00:33 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

We are only through the coin toss and I am ready to go full puritan and campaign for a prohibition on gambling dressed in a suffragette outfit.

08.02.2026 23:39 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I didn’t want this item of capitalism until I saw that it was endorsed by *spins wheel* Engelbert Humperdinck!

08.02.2026 23:31 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

On top of just generally looking like shit.

08.02.2026 23:00 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Incredible to suggest he ever had the newsroom.

08.02.2026 01:50 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

My big takeaway from having had to watch various Toy Story movies endlessly is that Woody is a jackass.

07.02.2026 01:27 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Genuine question: why engage them?

07.02.2026 00:08 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Man I extremely understand this. I have a limited amount of time to play games, I don’t need my ass handed to me repeatedly by the very first boss I encounter.

06.02.2026 17:47 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0