When I was growing up society told me that I should follow my dreams, which is how I spent most of my 20's as an unsuccessful pterodactyl.
09.03.2026 18:35
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When I was growing up society told me that I should follow my dreams, which is how I spent most of my 20's as an unsuccessful pterodactyl.
Look, I know that Samuel Gompers founded the AFL, but whenever I hear his name I can't help but think that he was one of Willy Wonka's rivals.
The World is your oyster. Slimy. Alive. Sometimes there's a pearl inside of it.
Still looking forward to the Ken Burns documentary about the Spencer Mansion. Here's hoping the Itchy Tasty account will be narrated by Paul Giamatti.
Is this a dagger I see before me? But, seriously, is it? Has anyone lost a dagger? It's dangerous to lose hovering daggers, people.
They were having a very Spanish year.
I'm picturing mushroom, sausage, gouda and anchovy paste in a bread shell, cooked in clay and then broken open from the top so it just sort of falls open.
Kleptomaniacs tend to take things literally.
"My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic" - You know, for a group whose friendship is essentially the only thing holding back Horse-Cthulhu on a regular basis, they don't seem like they get along that well.
Art Patron: "So, The Torment of Mezentius. Can we make it sexy?"
Louis Janmot: "What is it, again? The torment, I mean."
Art Patron: "Being tied to a decomposing corpse and left for dead."
Louis Janmot: "Hmmm... Can the corpse be a lady?"
Art Patron: "I don't see why not."
Ugh, wish I had more suggestions. My own eventually turned out to be 1953's 'Slime' by John Brennan, which I read one summer in the 80's (borrowed a book from a library) and then forgot about until the 2000's. If the internet didn't exist I'd probably still be searching for it.
Is it The Dead Man in Indian Creek? Right time frame, but I feel like there are more 'kids find body in a body of water' YA novels than you would expect.
Relatable.
Skeletons: Often loved for their inner beauty.
When life gives you cannons, make cannonade.
Share a TV show that raised you.
Mendoza is what happens when Han Solo and Aragorn are somehow the same person.
How do I get *into* this chickenshit outfit?
Does he also have a modest proposal?
Your husband has misplaced one of his toys. We mean models. Oh, never mind, he found it.
Your husband’s golden shoulder has been injured in a climactic battle.
Have you ever seen Inception?
Your husband is playing with toys again. Oh, sorry, we mean models.
Your husband may attempt to pass another man’s romantic gifts off as his own.
Your husband has invented scotch flavored gum. He is still seeing his counselor regarding his PTSD, right? Right?
Your daughter has become unstuck in time. Sigh. Look, we don’t mean to tell you how to live your life, but you might consider keeping your son well away from any potential tears in the space time continuum.
Your husband has adopted a gangster's cat.
Your husband was on a little ship. Your husband took a little trip.
Your husband has torn his pants, and the only man who can fix them has been taken hostage.
Your husband has been drawn into a deadly game of cat and mouse with the man who hems his pants.
Your husband has become unstuck in time. Again. You also might want to keep an eye on Rita Tannenbaum.