Gabriel Bell

Unfortunately, “Yo brother, legal team confirmed we can’t work with minors rn” is an instant classic

I assume that will be Paramount’s first act with the Warner Bros catalogue. Bogey poppin a Zyn in Casablanca. Dirty Harry slugging down an energy drink.

To modernize media for today’s audience, the criterion collection should release a digital remaster where they replace all the cigarettes with mango vapes

Tom Bombadil looking ass (complimentary)

I’d punch a baby for that kinda quad growth

Bro you look like you could not give two shits less about The One Ring and everybody’s gonna wonder what your whole deal is and nobody will ever figure it out

Hat “Nation Building is Gay”

Like come on dude, this is like Gen Z catnip

i really don’t like how many men on here feel comfortable saying “oh I don’t like him, but Platner’s not a nazi, he just was a dumb soldier.”

the blind spot yall have is very very frustrating.

Somebody bootleg this shit and scrape off that fuckass logo

Red ball cap NYC but the C is a hammer and sickle

Mug “I <3 Nicotine”

Guys, no matter how cool the shit looks you cannot buy any of Tucker Carlson’s merch, ironically or otherwise. Fuck him through the ground for real but goddamn it:

My single issue is firing squads so hop to with the candidates. Anybody running on healing and coming together can get fucked.

Idk he’d probably fire Bondi too if she didn’t have the picture

Hootin, hollerin’, stamping the floor biting my fist and such

Troops

They got you all hooked on gambling so they’d have one last desperate surge of volunteer triopsn

a man in a red shirt and yellow collar is juggling eggs Alt: a man in a red shirt and yellow collar is juggling eggs

Finna be on my Gaston shit

None of my birds were laying now all of my birds are laying. Turned around and had 5 dozen chicken/duck eggs. Ridiculous.

If you’ve ever been like damn this loser can’t post for shit and that’s too many emojis for not Facebook…there ya go

I mean, yes I’ve seen the flags in bios and all the “fella” accounts

Markwayne Mullin shitting his pants

Criminals everywhere just popped the biggest Chubb knowing this chickenshit loser is in charge

Watching as liberals realize the Capitol police are police too. ACAB means "all"

The best hot dog is kraut, brown mustard, and onions. Chili dog is elite.

Ketchup, mustard, relish is the only choice for a pool or amusement park, don’t need any surprises later

The replacement guy has two eyepatches

Buddy’s campaign was too myopic

I mean. At least the payout on “Yes” sucks.

Introduce the Draft Barron Act immediately

Remember, your 401(k) died defending a pedophile and in this country that makes it a hero

I didn’t know either of them well, but the one guy was a dorky happy fella who would ping me during large meetings to ask how the Justice League was going

Two different coworkers died over the weekend. Life’s short and weird, get as much from it as you can.

You can tell the folks who only grew up around prosperity grifter evangelicals versus those who grew up around actual end times believer evangelicals.

The end timers absolutely believe in a literal battle of the apocalypse with modern weapons and desperately want it to happen