Just note they talk slowly and call it a three minute sketch.
07.03.2026 15:14
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Just note they talk slowly and call it a three minute sketch.
Marine One is on the South Lawn
#TrumpBathroomCodes
#TrumpBathroomCodes
Old Glory is touching the ground
Trump discussing something with an aide behind a piece of paper
'A second plane has hit.'
'Ok Mr president, we'll get you changed after this meeting.'
John Peel
Pitchshifter Peel Sessions vinyl, t-shirt, CD and sticker. Ooh, shiny.
Yay, the @pitchshifter.bsky.social Santa has been!
Just submitted mine. Yours will likely be funnier, so get it in. You've got just under four hours.
And to you. Always a good batch of jokes to compete with when you're lead writer.
#BTN #BTNNB #BTNRejects
Women's brains change during pregnancy. The study lead said the changes are like caring for a tree, pruning branches to make others more efficient. It's also like it because you don't expect so much poo to be involved.
#BTN #BTNNB #BTNRejects
Women's brains change in pregnancy. The grey matter, the part of the brain involved in processing information and emotions, decreases by an average of nearly 5% during pregnancy. Of course, the grey has to go somewhere, explaining mothers with toddlers end up dying their hair
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The Pentagon has said the US Military will shoot anything that shoots at them. After accidently bringing down three jets in a friendly fire incident, the military in Kuwait are feeling nervous.
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Burger King's new AI listens to conversations and takes action based on key words. Trials in Scotland were abandoned after the police got called when staff said their branch was full of absolute weapons.
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A Scottish team is getting ready to take on the world's top shearers at this year's world cup in New Zealand. The team are nervous about taking on the kiwis, as they're a bit smaller than sheep, and might give a good pecking with their long beaks.
#BTN #BTNNB #BTNRejects
A woman has been hailed a money-saving genius after avoiding an airline's £30 luggage charge by putting her clothes in the post. Laura Poole said she was nervous about them being lost or sent to the wrong place, but that was less likely with Royal Mail than easyJet
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Rachel Reeves gave her spring statement to parliament, telling them growth figures had been revised downwards and unemployment numbers up. Shadow chancellor Mel Stride said the economy was bleeding out, ignoring the fact it was originally shot in the foot by the Tories.
I expect you to get totally pantoned for this
A struggle writing for #BTN this week as nothing's really been going on in the world. Nonetheless, everyone persisted and we got a show, including one of my gags nestled in the pile and making @marknelsoncomic.bsky.social laugh.
www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...
She's done it after realising her husband was the only person she'd ever seen write a reply to his fortune cookie.
She's done it after realising her husband was the only person she'd ever seen write a reply to his fortune cookie.
Joani Reid has suspended herself as a Labour MP due to accusations of her husband spying for China. She's done it after realising he was the only person she'd ever seen write a reply to his fortune cookie.
How I feel when someone blocks me.
Dictaphone, got to call Piers Morgan
In a rarity for a Tuesday brief, 14 jokes and all rounds hit for this week's #BTN. #WritingCommunity
Princess Anne's House of Reins
#replacingRichard
Continuing on a theme
