Kelsey

sometimes when i’m running late for my bus - I just run out in front of it & hope it stops so I can get on.

happy wednesday

probs written by AI & no one gave a fuck to read it over before pressing publish

yessssssssssss!!!!!!!!

anytime i get emails with news from america it always sounds fuckin made up.

yes, yes it is.

after a few months living abroad.. I feel I need to share some of the most asked questions when I tell folks i’m american:

1. “do you own a gun?”
2.”do you like Trump?”
3. “did your school ever get shot up?”
4.”why do people sue each other a lot?”
5.”did you know charlie kirk?”

please shut the hell up

I did. thank u.

ok ONE speakeasy that was only nice bc everything else around it was shit

do NOT dare trying to compare the rich beauty & history of Vienna to fucking Denver colorado ever again. That’s fucked up.

don’t waste the time. he is not very interesting in person as he is on the web.

that’s good! you can melt the ice for everyone! very thoughtful of you <3

I ran away and im hiding in a remote cave in the alps. probably won’t come back. pls don’t try to find me.

well thank god im not in Norway- i’m hiding out in a cave in the alps. doing well here tho. cave human development index & corruption perceptions index ranks #1 these days.

Before the 1990s, plane crashes caused by microbursts used to kill planeloads of people fairly regularly.

Dr. Ted Fujita and NCAR scientists figured out how to detect microbursts and warn pilots about them.

Since then? Zero airliner crashes from microbursts.

walk into the airport and there’s a fresh orange juice machine with prosecco next to it … in a country known for their extensive apple orchards… they have fresh orange juice in airport

i haven’t drank any water since being in europe and i’ve never been healthier or more alive.

running solely on espresso and wine. this is the life.

no bc it’s usually wrong / clickbait

trying to figure out why my music isn’t playing on my speaker and it’s because I connected to a random speaker belonging to a neighbour in my building.

my sincerest apologies to whoever I just blasted the song “Drugs From Amsterdam” to at 8pm on a Monday.

me every time “max velocity” posts weather stuff on the internet

“oh you’re american? I was in america once and i saw people with assault rifles.”

me: yeah

yeah as a fellow drunk passenger I would have to strongly disagree with this.

I would throw it in the trash if it was written in java

Tell me you work with a bunch of CS folk without telling me

27-year-old ex-Energy Department official looking at campaign in NJ-12 - New Jersey Globe Rep. Bonnie Watson Coleman (D-Ewing)’s decision to retire from the 12th congressional district has practically every Democratic politician in Central

this dude is awesome… I went to high school with him. Love seeing my peers live their dreams like I am living mine! newjerseyglobe.com/congress/27-...

my boss, who is not familiar with ERA5 data, when I tell him that the data we need requires 105 TB of storage & that the whole dataset is actually 5.88 PB…

clearly it didn’t work out for you…… :/

the duality of Vienna

my uber driver in Vienna is iranian and he just told me Trump was the best thing to happen to America. when I asked if he had been he said “no bc Trump banned us so it ruined my plans”

HELLO????? MAKE IT MAKE SENSE.