George Docherty

- The council…
- aye?
- Insurance job…
- zat right?
- Student flats…
- is it?
- Vape shops…
- ah blame Prometheus, masel

Union street fire: support Haus of Hair Last month, my wonderful hairdresser and friend Gemma left her job to fulfil her dream of starting her own salon with fellow stylist Aimee. 'Haus of Hair' opened last week. I visited on Friday and wa...

My hairdresser and friend opened her business last week. Tonight it burned to the ground. This is devastating.

I’ve set up a fundraiser. If you haven’t done anything for international women’s day yet, here’s a chance to support a women-run business in need: www.paypal.com/pools/c/9nhn...

just saw someone call Andrew Tate "Lawrence of Dry Labia" and spat my scotch out.

*current thoughts whilst trying to block out the fact that the apocalypse is drawing ever closer*

The kinkiest dinosaur was the Pegger-sore-arse.

Steinbeck: What did you think of my draft of 𝘖𝘧 𝘔𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘔𝘢𝘯?

Publisher: It needs more characters.

Steinbeck: I'll see what I can do.

Just call it Crown Court

Dr Oetker creator was in SS GERMANY: The founder of frozen pizza giant Dr Oetker was a Nazi who joined Hitler's SS, his son has revealed. Rudolf-August Oetker (pictured), who died in 2007, benefited from his close ties with Hitler, said 59-year-old August, the company's chairman.

What next? Bird's Eye Potato Waffen?

Cheerful looking dog with a telephone held to his ear, like he's having a lovely doggy phonecall

Roses are grey,
And violets are grey,
Hello, this is dog,
Please have a good day

Asking for an americano no milk almost kills me.

People often talk about double yolk eggs, but nobody ever brings up the difficult second albumen

‘Whoa Black Betty...’

ChatGPT says this is a great example of ironing.

Still the greatest video ever made. Sorry. I don't make the rules...

I highly recommend these guys. Really good prices and frames. iolla.com?gad_source=1...

one of the best things ever

A screenshot from Twitter. A post from @universaluk says “we need this view every day” and below they are quoting a post from the user @moonjam that says “Still thinking about the gigantic flying drone-Shrek at Annecy.”. The attached photo, from Annecy 2024, shows a huge Shrek face made drones carrying LEDS, hovering in the sky above a crowd below. To the right of the face, written in very small, white text are the words “I HAVE KILLED GOD, DONKEY”

Still feel sorry for the person managing Universal’s social media who hadn’t zoomed in to my photo before sharing it…

“It is time to keep your appointment with the Gingerbread Man.”

A cat god in a crown of ivy points off camera CAT-GOD CONDEMNING A VILLAGE THAT'S JUST OUT OF SHOT

As it seems to work so well for instagram accounts, behold, the greatest collection of prints in the history of art. marswasrubbish.etsy.com

this is culturally a vital work of modern art

I struggle with it. It’s a great film but the “ice cream wars” was so horrible that I’m always left uneasy. That’s Sinking feelings is the best, I think. The most “ right in the heart of it” rather than from an observer.

inside you there are two wolves, one who loves lamp and one who despairs of lamp

Made a wreath out of a ring light. Nothing says Christmas like glue burns on every finger

My server's gone down.

Best. Restaurant. Ever.

He's making a list,
he's checking it twice,
he's searching his pockets,
and finding his keys,
and checking the list again,
and making sure the lights are off,
now where's the list?
ok, found it, check again,
wait, did he lock up?
Santa Claus is getting,
too old for this shit.

🎶 Throw those curtains wide.. one day like this a year will make me crawl under a weighted blanket 🎶

Walking the destroyer of worlds before work. A monster led by a tiny monk with a flame on a stick

DOG a drawing of a dog with Dog in big letters behind it.

Ghosts of Scottish churchyards. A giant tartan ghost

Disappointed by nudist colony a creature peering over a hedge

I’ll almost certainly stop plugging my shop this weekend. Maybe. marswasrubbish.etsy.com

Fucking hell. The GFT was more important to me in my youth than theatre. Films I couldn’t see anywhere else.

When my wife told me Scandinavian languages don't have the letter 'R' I immediately thought: No way!

Read it for the first time in the mid eighties just before starting to audition for drama school. No exaggeration to say it was life changing. 20 years on from its first production and it felt like brand new. Working class, left school at 16 and this was like starting my education.

Missed the “ you”. Sorry Tom. Bloody actors paraphrasing.