Woke Blob

I haven't met him, but I'd imagine Zack would seem weird to people who think politics is about cosplaying Malcolm Tucker...

[We see a close up of a young white male, tanned, white teeth, coiffed hair clearly an influencer on social media. It is an image such as you see when social media posts are shown on the news. In the corner of the screen is named a location: DUBAI. He is staring slightly off-camera for several silent panels of the comic strip. His eyes move slightly. He is having a thought.] From off-screen a newsreader’s commentary comes: NEWSREADER: Extraordinary images here of an expat in Dubai [The influencer’s eybrows raise slightly] …Having their first ever geopolitical thought. [CUT TO a BBC news scene. The BBC newsreader CLIVE MYRIE is talking to an interviewee next to the screen showing the social media influencer’s face. The interviewee’s name is David Jones]. CLIVE MYRIE: To explain the significance of this moment we’re joined by David Jones, our Expat Thoughts correspondent DAVID JONES: Clive, this is momentous It was caught on film at the end of an Instagram post titled: ‘Dubai Is Brilliant’. [Pointing at the screen, the influencer’s expression still the same] You can clearly see in the eyebrows here, the dawning realisation that there *might* be something in the world beyond his dickhead self. It marks a *huge* departure from all the Dubai Expat’s previous thoughts. CLIVE MYRIE: Which are…? DAVID JONES: You've Got To Get Yourself Out Here Mate, Everything Is So Clean, I Don't Have To Pay Taxes, I Am Incurious As To Why I Do Not Have To Pay Taxes, and Spa. CLIVE MYRIE: And might we see an expansion of these new Thoughts in coming days? DAVID JONES: I think we can expect to see: “I Deserve To Be Airlifted By A Country I Pay No Tax To” CLIVE MYRIE: Mmm. [Ends]

"Richard! Stop hiding under a cache-misère of your own mythology! We have guests!"

Added to Glasman’s unique way with words and the ‘what we did over the summer’ memo, the defining feature of Blue Labour appears to have been acting like macho, ‘deeds not words’ guys while writing flowery sixth form poetry in the guise of campaign strategy.

I'm sure this empty posturing gets lots of approving reactions in his WhatsApp group, but it's usually a good idea to think about a wider audience than that

-throws a firecracker into a bear den-

"You have to help there are inexplicably lots of angry bears rampaging around!"

You may soon be called on to show inhuman levels of self-restraint. I hope you don't

BREAKING: it appears that the MHRA, in control of the UK puberty blocker trial, appointed a senior officer who had previously mocked supporters of trans rights online.

Recusal is not enough here. He and those responsible for appointing him should resign.

How can trans people trust them now?

Are you ok?

"He’s a sergeant, and they don’t deserve no respect at all sir. I should know. They’re cunning and artful, if they’re any good. I wouldn’t mind if he was an officer, sir. But sergeants are clever."

I think they were in The Chronicles of Riddick

Did you do this? It's wonderful

This is all very well, but... Keir Starmer voice coaching? The harms would be incalculable

Well now, this is interesting. Starmer has some preservation instincts after all...

MillHouse's Dad: "I have a big empty fridge, do you?"

I am sooo invested! Amazing scenes...

Man Who Lost Everything In Crypto Just Wishes Several Thousand More People Had Warned Him

Man Who Lost Everything In Crypto Just Wishes Several Thousand More People Had Warned Him https://theonion.com/man-who-lost-everything-in-crypto-just-wishes-several-t-1848764551/

Did I ever tell you the tragedy of Elon the wretched? I thought not. Its not a story Twitter would tell you...

It's funny that every time Elon leaves his carefully curated Potemkin village full of chatbots with suspiciously childlike faces, he's met with a roaring crowd of millions of people calling him a pedophile and telling him to pack a sack lunch and play some sudoku.

I think he's screwed

Harris continues to be an effective vehicle for the consultant class to drain money from donations.

Many of that cohort are in love with an idea of politicing - and a vision of an effective and admired political operator - rather than being united by any thought out ideals or values. They think of Malcolm Tucker as aspirational rather than a critique

They'd have to see this approach as wrong

Harris lost twice (given your reference to Sanders)

Moreover, a lot of the opposition to her is because of how she chose to fight the campaign - wheeling out Cheney etc. She has positioned herself, by choice, as part of the consultant class establishment Dems so many are furious with. Rightly

Starmer: "It really feels like I'm on the edge here. I need something to shore up my position and give the party confidence in my judgement"

McSweeney: "I have a cunning plan..."

This needs to be re-upped

I'm not being funny. I physically don’t know who he is.

...very petite

It would be extremely uncharitable of anyone to begrudge you this particular 'I told you so'