Pete Hegseth Blows Into Breathalyzer To Unlock Phone
theonion.com/pete-he...
30.03.2025 15:00
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Pete Hegseth Blows Into Breathalyzer To Unlock Phone
theonion.com/pete-he...
Imagine thinking you’re so special that disliking you is evil.
No joke— I did this at restaurants when my kids were toddlers to keep them entertained so they wouldn’t freak out in public.
Can I run DOGE?
Musk and Trump could not possibly be sending a clearer signal that the Tesla protests are working than this pathetic stunt today.
Lifelong chaotic good checking in 🙋🏼♀️
Write a letter demanding the release of Mahmoud Khalil using this link. Do not let them disappear this man.
actionnetwork.org/letters/dema...
And watch the incompetently engineered, flaming SpaceX rocket debris fill the sky like the most expensive fireworks in history.
If you’re interested in falling down some interesting insider trading rabbit holes: capitoltrades.com
Alt take on Severance s02 e08 “Christmas in Salt’s Neck” - Hallmark movie poster
I’d watch it
I’m gonna need a meme lord to keep this updated for me…
i’M a nAvY sEaL iN tHiS sHit…
You know how in some wars, there's the side who says, "War has rules, we line up with our horses, point our guns, and fire at the same time," and then there's the other side that runs out of the trees with rusty knives and they start stabbing the fucking horses? The Democrats are the first group.
Care Bear STARE…
*swastika sparkles in an arc from JD’s furry stomach*
Sounds like dude’s gonna struggle to register to vote under the SAVE act…
This is what leadership looks like...
I’m kinda fascinated with the question that came up in the last episode of #Severance:
If you were caught in a mudslide, would you be more afraid of suffocating or drowning?
I wonder what the answers are supposed to indicate.
Whatever it means, I vote suffocation. 🙋🏼♀️ How about you?
Conan: You know, Anora is having a good night. That's great news. Two wins already. I guess Americans are excited to see somebody finally stand up to a powerful Russian.
Damn. Every time I think #Severance can’t get any better, it goes does something like this. 😭
Big news for anyone with federal student loans: after we rang the alarm, a judge stopped Elon Musk and his team from seizing your personal data.
This is why we get in the fight.
Am I a romantic or a pragmatist? Stay tuned.
Here’s mine
Show me yours
Were they offering to be one or were they asking you to be one? I feel like they’re not great at this.
The Eagles boycotted the White House in 2018, too. Seems like actual Eagles fans wouldn’t be that surprised this time around.
😕
In a similar dark vein, the kids and I have discussed how Jon didn’t have to watch his Mars hero become the world’s biggest doofus/super villain.
In 6th grade I wanted to do a report on propaganda for TAG. My mom said that was a boring topic.
I was like, “It’s, like, how you trick whole countries!” And she shrugged like, meh.
I did a report on aviaries instead.
My mom is now a Trumper. I should have done the damn propaganda report.
It’s the “I don’t know, we’ll have to see on that” for me. It’s the “let’s see if this bullshit ends up affecting me personally and then I’ll let you know” that’s telling.
