I have found the most effective productivity hack for AI is asking it to be proud of me.
04.03.2026 00:38
👍 7
🔁 1
💬 0
📌 0
Are single-digit billionaires the new working class?
03.03.2026 12:57
👍 881
🔁 108
💬 19
📌 4
I CANNOT JUST KEEP HIKING UP MY PANTS WHEN THINGS GO WRONG. IF I HIKE UP MY PANTS ANY FURTHER, I WILL BE DROWNING IN PANT.
03.03.2026 14:23
👍 207
🔁 68
💬 7
📌 1
Bluesky Milfia
03.03.2026 14:45
👍 5
🔁 0
💬 0
📌 0
They call us the bluesky milfs
03.03.2026 14:34
👍 8
🔁 3
💬 2
📌 0
pole = 💈
poll = 🗳️
03.03.2026 13:54
👍 586
🔁 77
💬 26
📌 8
The real challenge was trying to say “real world/road rules” without sounding stupid
03.03.2026 00:10
👍 15
🔁 3
💬 1
📌 0
Imagine being a prophet in like 2015 and trying to explain how stupid everything will get, but being unable to without mentioning affliction shirts and monster energy drinks
03.03.2026 14:03
👍 115
🔁 25
💬 4
📌 1
the weirdest part of driving one of those dune sandworms around would be where do you park it
02.03.2026 12:13
👍 176
🔁 25
💬 17
📌 0
Getting an abacus tattoo so that you can always count on me.
03.03.2026 01:07
👍 195
🔁 44
💬 11
📌 3
[at a spider wedding]
congratulations to the newlywebs
02.03.2026 14:47
👍 371
🔁 98
💬 10
📌 1
Don't worry everybody, there's a 22 yo in charge of counter terrorism and Kash Patel fired most of the experts in Iranian militant groups.
03.03.2026 02:12
👍 2693
🔁 599
💬 39
📌 20
So as I understand it, it is the policy of the United States that the President can unilaterally issue orders to kill the leader of any country at any time for any reason?
03.03.2026 03:23
👍 2169
🔁 491
💬 241
📌 49
people love to say "you should read conservative opinion pieces too" and every conservative opinion piece is like "corporations should have the right to vote but minorities shouldn't. source: I made it up"
02.03.2026 19:08
👍 3967
🔁 756
💬 57
📌 47
Hello? Yes hi I’m your problem now, thought I’d let you know
28.09.2024 18:18
👍 91
🔁 37
💬 6
📌 0
oh dang it lol
03.03.2026 05:45
👍 1
🔁 0
💬 1
📌 0
Chicken and bacon are crispy. Donuts and rice are krispy. It seems the thing that makes a C a K is where vegetarians draw the line.
02.03.2026 22:15
👍 6
🔁 1
💬 0
📌 0
Candyland has a tragic backstory. It used to be a thriving kingdom with a rich ecosystem until corruption destroyed the land, resulting in dessertification.
02.03.2026 22:06
👍 32
🔁 11
💬 0
📌 0
I love my bots. I know my numbers are inflated but it’s all I have.
02.03.2026 22:04
👍 1
🔁 0
💬 0
📌 0
There is a brand of toilet seats named Church. When you sit on it, you make a pew.
02.03.2026 22:03
👍 17
🔁 4
💬 0
📌 0
Sin is short for “sleeping in.”
02.03.2026 22:00
👍 12
🔁 3
💬 0
📌 0
I am a sexual icon in the way a sock on the side of the highway is high fashion
02.03.2026 21:57
👍 69
🔁 26
💬 1
📌 0
My brother may have a career, wife, kids, friends, working vehicle, home, and retirement plan, but *I* have more followers on Bluesky!
02.03.2026 21:55
👍 11
🔁 1
💬 1
📌 0
The closet I’ll ever get to having a trophy wife is spray painting a mannequin bronze
02.03.2026 21:51
👍 29
🔁 9
💬 1
📌 0
What I lack in dating ability I make up for in golemancy
02.03.2026 21:50
👍 5
🔁 1
💬 0
📌 0
The worst thing a species can be is delicious.
05.01.2026 17:44
👍 229
🔁 82
💬 13
📌 8
I have been condemned to death by uns uns, which is a severe lack of snu snu
01.03.2026 11:21
👍 12
🔁 1
💬 1
📌 0
Monster under my bed is getting bullied by the one in my closet ffs
01.03.2026 11:19
👍 41
🔁 16
💬 0
📌 0
It’s ok to be in love with me. We all have things we’re ashamed of that keep us up at night.
01.03.2026 11:18
👍 25
🔁 8
💬 0
📌 0
Mad about the state of the world and it’s not even Tuesday yet
01.03.2026 11:17
👍 7
🔁 0
💬 0
📌 0
