Doc

Real stable genius shit.

Oh yeah, that just started recently. I would like to opt out of being warned please….

BookNerd seems to have inherited my acronym skills… She thinks we need to have weekly Family Fun Sunday… 🤪 #FFS

Climate Change being referred to as ‘Global Warming’ always seemed wrong to me…should’ve been Global Weather Unpredictability, but it doesn’t roll off the tongue as well.

I mean that obviously worked with the current idiot…

There will be a transition period where she will very occasionally send you very sweet texts.

Ask me how I know.

We are going to the after-hours fundraiser at the library tonight, and I’m really disappointed I don’t have some kind of cute literary outfit to wear.

Oberon, our princely Ragdoll cat

That’s what we have now!!

I would like to join your polycule…

Bermans?? Or Siamese?

Damn, $4.27 for a plain croissant at #Starbucks. That feels more like a $3 menu item to me…

Also, GET OFF MY LAWN!!

This is cracking me up!!

(But what will my daughter say??…culturally she is much less than half man…with two moms and family too scattered for uncles to be major fixtures)

😮‍💨

(But also that is the tragic flaw of pets with much shorter lifespans than us, right??…dogs especially, but any rescue really when you’re not exactly sure when in their journey you met them…May you have MANY happy years with your adorable fluff)

I just had to scroll your whole recent feed to make sure this was just some future doomerism nonsense your brain was conjuring and and not a real, imminent thing… 😧

Speaking as a physician with exercise induced asthma that was not diagnosed until she ran with other physicians, I can relate. Also, someday may you be able to tell the difference between out of shape out of breath and airway changes out of breath…

Yeah, it turns out Noem has a four year degree, in Poli Sci… That she finished while she was in Congress.

🎯

I like it when the #snow makes my commute pretty, but not treacherous.

What helps in that regard is when everyone removes the bulk of the snow from their cars… #MEWx

Hahahaha…perfect!

My wife to BookNerd: ‘I was thinking of two things that would give you an opportunity to do ALL THE TALKING: improv and debate’

AKA, maybe we can find you an outlet so you’re at least *a little bit depleted before it gets to the end of the day w/ #LittleGuy in bed & our brains dead like last night

Are you referring to the idiot Kristi or the idiot Markwayne??

I misread the F word in the last sentence as FRAUD….and I suspect I may not be wrong.

It’s not April 1st yet…

lol

I think we gently corrected, but also agreed with her that it deserved the moniker more, since it was actually golden!

The Golden Gate Bridge! -exclaimed my 7 yo as we drove into town

I’m sad that this story may be apocryphal but I did go to the wedding of a Frito Lay executive’s daughter and there was the most amazing snack table, including PINK X/O Cheetos!

Ugh, yes. But my daughter just blames me for her big <lastname> arms…

Ears are not particularly amenable to plastic surgery… I don’t think he was actually injured. And I try not to think any more about it, b/c entertaining any kind of conspiracy theory seems like a slippery slope.

I guess this is the new Wednesday routine… why am I late to work today? NOT because I didn’t want to come, but because I was left unattended, and there were goldfish on the floor of the living room play area and cushions strewn about … #ChoreADD