CrazyFeralCatLady

"could be roxy's" I say to myself as I add my 277th book to my tbr pile.

Can’t right now, I just got a new label maker and I need put labels on EVERYTHING

If you start screaming at the office, they'll usually just let you go home

brb the crows are calling me outside

The fact that we can watch war on our televisions like it's a reality show is really fucking disturbing.

Breaking:
Today, Trump said and/or did something stupid, unethical, and/or illegal.

Bookmark this and reread daily to keep up to date on US news.

the problem is we here at gen x have the highest separation between the coolest members and the uncoolest members of any generation

posting about raccoons while 38,000 feet in the air. this is what my ancestors fought for.

There is nothing like a wide, fat, chonky, thick book in your hand.

I don't want to heal my inner child, but I do want to drown her in evermore lyrics and buy her every single book she sees on booktok.

my new year’s resolution is to stop procrastinating

so awesome that we found a way to make podcasts even more annoying by filming them as they're being recorded

Miranda rights? but officer, I'm a Samantha

there is nothing more humbling than getting passport photos taken

I've never panicked at the disco but I have actually panicked at the airport, suddenly convinced I have a semiautomatic and a pound of china white on me.

Date: I don’t believe in drugs

Me, super high: oh they’re out there

Well well well if it isn't the same bill I couldn’t afford to pay in a different color

I talk a lot of shit for someone who is routinely startled by the sound of my freezer making ice

A wise man once said "you little stupid ass bitch I aint fuckin with you"

I’m starting to suspect the government doesn’t want what’s best for me

my 5 year plan is to eventually put my phone down

When life gives you lemons, hand that motherfucker a potato. Now he's just as confused as you are.

sometimes you just have to take a step away from the news and focus on the fact that no one loves you

haven’t had a police chief ask me what my major malfunction was in a while

if you love something kill it. kill it now before it ever gets a chance to hurt you

how many sacrifices are we allowed each blood moon again?

Me: good night moon

Blood moon: bring me blood

Me: go to sleep moon

life shouldn’t be this difficult knowing mf’s just wanna be happy

I'm not lazy I just really enjoy doing nothing for long periods of time

maybe she’s born with it, maybe she’s wolverine