Cal

Ceres is lucky she’s cute. NO ONE WANTS TO PLAY AT 3AM, DOG, YOU ARE A MONSTER

It could be the C and I misremember because I only think about this once a year, but it’s whatever the thing where I say “I spent this much on nail polish bottles and fancy mica, don’t tax it” and I hate TurboTax SO MUCH but I hate the possibility of an audit MORE so I’ve been putting up with it. 😭

Wait, can it handle Schedule B? Dumbfuck business deduction shit is the only reason why I’ve been trapped in TurboTax hell and for some reason (lobbying) I was under the impression that they were the only ones who could do the full 1040.

It is THE VERY BEST, bar none, and it is a crime how little known it is. Bruce in the graveyard is like the platonic ideal of demonstrative grief.

Guess who just learned that her business’s hosting provider uses the AWS UAE stack! 👋

😭

I’m sorry to butt in but please can you tell me more about making the greatest Batman story ever EVEN BETTER by making it gay because OH MY GOD

My hands are comically unusable after filling 56 vials of perfume yesterday, so I am trying to touchpad my way through blendering a palm insert for gloves so doing my favorite part of my job doesn’t leave me completely useless for a week.

Wait, Zootopia is already canonically the same universe, why in the world are they doing this

Oh noooo now there’s a report button, why can’t we have nice things

SO GOOD

My Japanese friends growing up always did night baths because sleeping in the previous day’s filth was a no-go. They used a blow dryer or washed hair separately in the morning.

Of course you didn’t commit a crime, you were all the way over here with me the entire time

Image request for Agent 008, James Octobond, and the resulting purple octopus in sunglasses holding a gun and a martini

youraislopbores.me is fucking incredible

This entire thread is absolute bangers and I would just like to add that Pokémon: The Movie is Blade Runner for children. Mewtwo even makes a tears in rain speech!

I have asked for a picture of a corgi in a top hat. I have been given a cube labeled “corgi” in a top hat. It’s genius.

THANK YOU for introducing me to this infinite joy machine.

M O N S T E R S

We keep an indoor garden for herbs and small vegetables, but since it is INDOORS I have to take a little paintbrush and pollinate everything by hand and every time I do this I think NOW KISS

This is what I mean when I say TH’s hyperlocal coverage is still important. These are my kids, my neighborhood — and Williamson County gets written off as a Vichy state ALL THE TIME

Emma Hamm, Deep Waters!

The Rapture. Seriously, that’s it. They’re trying to trigger Left Behind.

And yet we still don’t have the infrastructure for interstate electric. This is gonna suuuuuuck

701489, I am OLDDDDDD

The sad thing is that’s not even a really impressive ICQ number. Real ones know 6 digit was where it’s at. 😂

Binkie wrangler

[Exit Murderer.]

Let’s check in with Wall Street:

You can tell who had a genesis and who had a snes by asking them if they ever beat Aladdin and the Lion King

‘Heated Rivalry’ Creator Jacob Tierney Sets Netflix Drama About Alexander the Great and Aristotle With Jason Bateman as EP Netflix has given a series order to 'Alexander,' a drama series from 'Heated Rivalry' creator Jacob Tierney about Alexander the Great.

Remember my bit about historical lefties? GUESS WHO IS ONE OF THEM AND IT IS ACTUALLY IMPORTANT

…at least we know he’ll be queer 😭

Titus Andronicus and The Winter’s Tale, for their overwhelming support of my “in 2572 lit classes will study Michael Bay just like this” thesis

Much Ado and Henry V, for dialogue

The Scottish Play, for everything

A shiny silver bag full of a thousand gorgeous multicolor whistles

I got to be part of one of the glorious bulk requests, where admins go “who has whistles, need 20k” and it is SO GRATIFYING when this is accomplished minutes.

Need whistles? Request at 3dwhistles.com, and if you’d like to help me out, my filament wishlist is here: www.amazon.com/registries/g...