your idiot friend

release more epstein files to distract from Iran to distract from the epstein files to distract from Venezuela to distract from the epstein files to distract from Minneapolis with aggressive to distract from the epstein files to distract from…

✅✅ marinated laundry

"The CIA conspired to make me less cool than I was when I was 25" is the most succinct Gen X manifesto I've ever heard

They would be so mad at you right now if they could read

my world is unravelling

oh fuck is that what Grape-Nuts were!?!?

are there... balls-free cereals like watermelons? or do you have to mechanically separate the balls?

*enters the faraday cage room, unwraps and turns on a fresh laptop, opens tor to duckduckgo* when did cereal lose its balls, which cereals used to have balls, when i ate cereal as a kid was i eating balls, where did the balls go

”you’re back early”
[grabs gun] “cereal got its balls back”

Quote from Washington Times editorial board "[Radical liberals] don't realize that, when they express contempt for the man who holds the country's highest office, they reveal their contempt for the Americans who put him there."

Uh no...we definitely realize it.

yeahhh i started reading him because... not to put too fine a point on it but "know your enemy" and boy howdy is he the master of using 100,000 words when 500 would have sufficed.

And my axe

this was me until 5 minutes ago

WTF are we doing

hahaha not me reading this while my partner is still in bed jfc…

art of the deal, baby

Matt Bruenig built a claude skill that tempts people to waive attorney client privilege in anything they write to it

for folks who are active on x, threads, etc and feel bad about it bc of its stewards but have a hard time letting go: sometimes your behaviors overpower your values online because tech companies hire psychologists & sociologists to come up with ways to put you in that position

Taxidermy stripper squirrel on a pole

Girl, where’d you get those shoes?

This guy gets it.

[judge about to halt legal proceedings]: i am here to stay

certainly makes me feel less than enthused about the US hockey team but I continue to hold that Kash treating the FBI director job as an extended make-a-wish trip is the absolute least damaging thing he could do with the position given this administration's goals

Clearly the most correct answer

The snow is back. But New York is ready. Here's everything you should know about tomorrow's blizzard.

Stay safe, stay warm, and sign up for real-time updates by texting NotifyNYC to 692-692.

A list of “top 20 most dangerous college campuses”. #1 is Texas A&M and #2 is Cal Berkeley. The rest of the list is irrelevant because it’s so stupid

Finally a W to lord over my Cal friends

*snaps fingers*

git commit --allow-empty --author="Steve Klabnik <steve@ismad.com>" -m "i am mad"

I dunno buddy seems like you're mad and you have no one else but yourself to git blame

I got a great question on my Ramadan thread: do Muslims also need to avoid consumption by proxy in videogames? Does consuming in-game food or drink break the fast? Basically: does your character have to go fast?

The answer is no, unless you happen to be playing Sonic the Hedgehog.

*casually tosses some of your packing peanuts in the trash blissfully unaware*

"the camp was raided to confiscate letters from the children"

i don’t talk about my morged continvouclous in public because i’m not a filthy degenerate