D.N. Schmidt, sci-fi author🪐📚

😆Best laugh I've had all morning!

* Sassysquatch

Some idiot on Reddit was trying to tell me that all the medical evidence against the time change has been debunked. Oh, I guess sleep disruption has no negative health effects! Won't all those sleep medicine specialists be relieved to know that it's not a problem anymore!

Good point! It could be a mix of What We Do In The Shadows and Full House. Any time the kids tell him about trouble at school, the troublemaker mysteriously disappears. The next day, the school administration finds a note on the classroom door. "I moved to France. Sincerely, Lady Math Teacher."

Oh, those are great!

New model could sharpen gravy?

Oh, Yelp for zombies is a great idea! They could call it Groan!

Less Impressive Monsters:

* Med Student Jekyll

* The Fan of the Opera

* Dadula

* The Mommy

* The Inaudible Man

* The Woof Man

* The Teacher from the Black Lagoon

Sure, I’ll even have some tofu brains ready for any vegan zombies that might come along

I’ll make sure there’s milk in the fridge 🍪

You know that feeling when a chocolate chip cookie turns out to be raisin? That's my strategy for the zombie apocalypse. I can't fight, so the most I can do is hope that eating me is mildly disappointing.

I tried using flux once, but it just gave me an itchy rash. Apparently I have a metallurgy.

When Grandpa found out was building a website, he said, "I've got something that might help," and gave me an old soldering iron.

I'm trying to help a couple of beginner writers get the knack of showing instead of telling. It's a tricky thing to master. It's one of those things you can learn about faster than you can learn to do, so it can be frustrating. I try to be encouraging when I can.

Exactly! I was totally going for an evil Zaphod vibe. 😄

I keep getting “I noticed you’re a writer with a Creative Writing degree. Do you want to work at a bank doing math?”

Nooooooooooo

I feel like some writer was struggling with this assignment. “I have to come up with fifty party games? And none of them can involve necking or liquor? Um… What about assault? Is that okay?”

And the medical examiner guy from CSI once asked me where the bottled water was, and I said “over there.” So that’s two famous people I’m best friends with now.

Keep Your Hands To Yourself by The Georgia Satellites, but just the “I got a little change in my pocket going jing-a-ling-a-ling” part.

There are some things man was never meant to know.

How famous do you have to be for a “verified” account? Wil Wheaton replied to one of my Reddit comments once. Does that count?

Kraft Cheddar Divorces

I asked my phone if it wanted to join me in the hot tub and it said it just wanted to be friends. 😔

LLMs don’t have feelings. Math doesn’t get anxiety! Math causes anxiety!

If you type “Man, I’m really” and your phone suggests “tired,” that’s just what the math says is the most likely next word. It doesn’t mean your phone needs a nap!

33 Neon and Nebulas Merging the aesthetic of neon-drenched cyberpunk cities with the grandeur of space opera. Take it back to those fantastic art covers from the Sixties and Seventies, where all things seemed possible…

Happy #fridayreads

Captain Lumen of the lightship Sirius must escape a Nazziren darkweb in The Brightest Star

Boundary Shock Quarterly 33

Neon and Nebulas. The bright lights of cyberpunk meet the darkness of space.

www.boundaryshockquarterly.com/product/33-n...

Cover for The Knight Saves the Dragon by Rebecca Crunden; background is a water colour type picture of a castle with trees and mountains behind, leaves surround the edges.

✨ FANTASY SHORT STORY ✨

🐉 a dragon (with a princess)
🗡️ a knight (with a plan)
👑 a palace (with a cruel king)
🏰 second pov

🔖 universal link: mybook.to/eJsBfU
💌 itch.io link: rebecca-crunden.itch.io/the-knight-s...
📖 goodreads: www.goodreads.com/book/show/21...

[ #booksky ]

salmon/cotton candy pink background with a book cover and a cover blurb on it: book cover:a very washed out/faded picture of a lit-up ferris wheel in a hazy summer sunset, with "Amusement Park Arcana" over it in black writing. Jennifer R. Donohue is at the bottom. cover blurb: Riley's best friend Tara went missing last October from the shitty amusement park where she worked. By spring, the police are no closer to having any answers, so Riley's taking it in her own hands. She just knows Tara's still at the park somewhere, and an uncanny phone call on Riley's first day as a park employee only confirms that. The quest to bring Tara or her body home draws Riley further from her family and her boyfriend as she spends more time in the park's liminal spaces and opening day looms large. coming July 15, 2026

thanks Gabino!

my new novella is available for ebook preorder! Amusement Park Arcana comes July 15, 2026

books2read.com/AmusementPar...

I hope they go at night so it’s safe!

My two book covers, against a starry background. STERNENDACH has red bat wings, a book, and fangs. THE GLASS GARDEN has a kaleidoscope image on it.

Hello to BlueSky and my new followers! Please check out my novellas:

THE NIGHT LIBRARY OF STERNENDACH is a bittersweet vampire opera in sonnets.

THE GLASS GARDEN is space horror.

Covers designed by @kglyder.bsky.social.
linktr.ee/authorlevai

A FREE horror collection! Twisted tales featuring zombies, cryptids, ghosts, haunted forests, and more:

getbook.at/ashandboneal...

“I enjoyed it thoroughly … the style here screamed fresh, new, original.”--Well Read Beard